Some people think that children can learn about history by visiting museums, while others feel that there are better ways to learn about history. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is argued that exploring
museums
is one effective way to absorb
history
knowledge for
students
.
However
, others believe that
students
can learn
history
more effectively in other ways. In my opinion, the feasible measure to teach
history
to children should be mixing the two methods mentioned. On the one hand, most people think that visiting
museums
would help
students
have a deeper understanding of
history
, which is completely reasonable.
This
is because
students
would get to observe relics, authentic ancient tools and weapons exhibited in
museums
, which may lead them to imagine how the daily life of ancestors of human beings lived and visualize important historical events in an obvious way.
Moreover
,
museums
often have been arranged in a chronological time order, which would support
students
to easily follow the content of historical events.
For example
, the Museum
History
of
Vietnam
has arranged exhibition rooms from 10000 BC until 1975, the
ending
Replace the word
end
show examples
time of the
Vietnam
War period.
Therefore
, after viewers wander once
round
Correct your spelling
around
show examples
, they may briefly understand
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Vietnam
's
history
.
On the other hand
,
students
may
also
learn more about
history
via
Change preposition
in
show examples
some other ways. It could be visiting historical areas. Discovering historical sites can give them more chances to practically experience activities from old times, which may help them to remember historical knowledge effectively.
For instance
, when children go for a visit to the Cu Chi tunnel, one of the most famous historical areas in
Vietnam
, they can take part in the daily activities of citizens in Wartime. Since that,
students
partly
imagine
Wrong verb form
imagined
show examples
the
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
of people at that time.
Besides
this
, learning
history
through videos or the Internet is
also
an advantageous way.
This
is because
students
could approach historical pieces of information even if they no longer exist.
For example
, Babylon was an ancient city, which completely disappeared from the world but now we still find information about
this
city by video on YouTube or some online newspapers. In conclusion, I firmly believe that
students
can completely digest historical knowledge by going to
museums
and visiting ruined areas or finding information on the Internet as well.
Submitted by nguyenduygovap on

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task achievement
Your essay shows a clear position throughout, and you provide a good attempt to address all parts of the task, leading to a well-rounded argument. Make sure to fully address the question's task, including comparing the views and stating your own opinion distinctly.
coherence cohesion
While you have a good logical structure and clear paragraphs, make sure that every main point in the body paragraphs is explicitly supported by an example or justification to strengthen coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are distinct and clear, which is commendable. However, always ensure that the conclusion summarises your views coherently, reflecting back on the points discussed.
task achievement
You have used some relevant examples, but they need to be more detailed to enhance the effectiveness of the arguments. Whenever giving an example, ensure that it is substantial and well-explained to maximise its impact.

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