In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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Today’s
companies
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persist in the creativity of their supplies in their advertisements everywhere.
Overall
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, as everyone knows, it is the fact that technology has covered all aspects of our life and it causes the new generation of
products
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.
However
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, I believe there are manifold disadvantages to
this
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notion.
To begin
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with, consumerism stimulates
companies
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to create a newer generation of
products
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every year.
This
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stimulation, not only leads to bringing out the hidden creativity of factories but
also
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makes a challenging environment for them to be dominant in the market.
For instance
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, Samsung and Apple express their watch in a big announcement every year and consist of the new features and services which have been provided.
Hence
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, many individuals believe it is a competition between two big
companies
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that want to be the first seller of watches throughout the world.
Also
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, their engineers try their best to deploy the art of facilities to show the highest level of ingenuity in the vintages.
However
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, these commercials have many negative feedbacks.
Firstly
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,
although
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it makes life easier, consumerism has grown remarkably from the past. Many individuals are forced to devote a big part of their monthly salary to buy these
products
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.
Secondly
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, if there is no advertising monitoring by authorities,
companies
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can present several inappropriate things about their new product. A salient example is that a Chinese company had claimed two years ago that its new electronic watch is water durable, but many customers just found out it was a lie after buying the vintage.
Finally
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, I believe the development of technology is too risky,
although
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robots will capture our interest, they can hold every aspect of our lives. In conclusion,
companies
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are making extraordinary
products
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day by day and it has several advantages.
Nevertheless
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, we can deny the fact that the drawbacks of
this
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enhancement are by no means negligible.
Submitted by farzin_seyednejad on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Include an introduction and a conclusion that clearly state your thesis and summarize your main points. The introduction and conclusion were present and generally framed the essay, but could have been more impactful with stronger thesis statements and summaries.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with specific examples or evidence. In this essay, some examples were provided but they were not always clearly connected to the main argument or fully elaborated.
task achievement
Ensure you fully respond to all parts of the task, presenting a clear position throughout with well-developed ideas. The response to the prompt was somewhat complete but could have benefited from further exploration of the reasons behind the emphasis on 'new' in advertising, as well as a deeper analysis of its implications.
task achievement
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task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to reinforce your arguments throughout the essay. While some examples were present, ensuring their relevance and elaborating on them would enhance the validity of the points made.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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