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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefis of university education for both individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In
this
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 day and age, the topic of study at
college
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 has undeniably become a critical issue for the general public. Some individuals argue that there is no reason for students to attend to
university
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 except receive well-paid jobs. Others maintain that
college
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 offers a variety of profits for both residents and the community.
This
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 essay will provide thorough demonstrations of these contrasting points of view. On the one hand, it is essential to recognize that individuals ought to acknowledge the significant advantages of a
university
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 education. There is no doubt that studying at
college
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 affords pupils intensive knowledge which can elevate the opportunity of finding a good occupation.
In addition
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, after graduating from
college
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, citizens are equipped with an enormous amount of comprehension and take for themselves a certificate.
As a result
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, it is noteworthy that between an individual who does not have any professional understanding and the one who does, the latter will have a higher chance of being accepted to work.
On the other hand
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,
besides
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 the purpose of supplying knowledge, the education of
university
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 plays an integral part in society. To illustrate, not only lecturers and students work in the
university
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, but security guards, cleaning staff, and healthcare staff
also
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 have functions in that environment.
Furthermore
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, pupils can enhance many important
skills
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 which can improve their personal and professional
skills
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, namely interpersonal
skills
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, resilience, and discipline. To summarize, the education of
college
Use synonyms
 offers several benefits for both inhabitants and the social public, especially widening knowledge for students.
Therefore
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, the essence is generating a sympathetic environment where graduates have abilities to make use of their
skills
Use synonyms
 and understanding for dedication to the community.

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task achievement
While you've presented both views well, consider expanding on your ideas with more detailed examples. This will strengthen your arguments and provide clearer support for your points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use a greater variety of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your essay. This will improve the coherence of your ideas and make your arguments more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Consider refining your thesis statement to clearly outline the main argument of your essay. This will help guide your readers and enhance the structure of your introduction.
task achievement
You've successfully introduced both views on the topic, showing an understanding of the different perspectives surrounding university education.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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