Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in team sports, like football. While other people think that taking part in individual sports is better, like swimming. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #part #team #sports #football

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There are debates

whether

Change preposition

about whether

show examples

people should involve themselves in individual or group

sports

Although

doing

sports

alone benefits more on the comprehensive personal judgements,

sports

activity in

team

Add an article

the team

a team

show examples

is giving more lessons in interpersonal relationship. A one-person sport might

be benefited

Wrong verb form

benefit

show examples

in terms of receiving complete

feedbacks

Fix the agreement mistake

feedback

show examples

. Generally, trainers will be more focused

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show examples

controling

Correct your spelling

controlling

and evaluating one player,

hence

the feedback

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show examples

their performances

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

given in a

detail

Replace the word

detailed

show examples

, yet immaculate way, in order to improve their area of weakness, and

consequently

gradually enhance their abilities.

However

, I think it is unfortunate for the players

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apply

show examples

since they cannot obtain

another skills

Replace the adjective

another skill

other skills

show examples

that might be learned from doing

sports

Conversely

, team

sports

taught its players to not only pay attention

toward

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show examples

capabilities

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

to be aware of other's behaviours. That skill is quite essential in

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

collective-played

sports

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because during a match, actions from each

players

Change to a singular noun

player

show examples

are related to one another in causal and effect patterns.

For instance

, the accuracy point from

striker

Correct article usage

a striker

show examples

to be able to

shot

Wrong verb form

shoot

show examples

a goal in

football

Correct article usage

a football

show examples

match depends on the kicking angle from the middle field player. I,

therefore

suport

Correct your spelling

support

this

view since, as a human, people are taught to be

social

Add an article

a social

the social

show examples

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

which means they have to be able to feel the presence of other

poeple

Correct your spelling

people

, and through group

sports

activity, that attitude can be accomplished. In conclusion, individual

sports

might

advantageous

Add a missing verb

be advantageous

show examples

in their complete evaluations to improve weakness

spot

Fix the agreement mistake

spots

show examples

, but in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

bigger picture, I

belisve

Correct your spelling

believe

team

sports

can

taught

Change the verb form

teach

be taught

show examples

people to acknowledge the important

existance

Correct your spelling

existence

of others.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Sun Dec 10 2023

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Coherence Cohesion

Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The introduction should outline the points that you will discuss, each body paragraph should focus on a specific point, and the conclusion should summarise your argument and restate your opinion.

Coherence Cohesion

Use a variety of linking words to connect your ideasmore effectively. Cohesion can be improved by making better use and repetition of key nouns and pronouns across sentences to ensure the text flows.

Task Achievement

Expand on the examples provided by giving specific details and explaining how they support your main points. Each body paragraph should have at least one clear, developed example.

Task Achievement

Be cautious with grammar and vocabulary to avoid creating barriers for the reader. Errors can reduce the clarity of your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

camaraderie
teamwork
leadership skills
social interactions
self-reliance
personal discipline
cooperative learning
peer motivation
flexible schedule
psychological benefits
collective achievements
sense of accomplishment
personal accountability
wellness goals
social interaction
personal mastery
solitary tendencies

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Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in team sports, like football. While other people think that taking part in individual sports is better, like swimming. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries, the gap between the rich and poor is widening. What problems can this cause, and what solutions can you suggest?

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

“Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?”

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events.Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?