In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation

this

present world,

home

is very important and the importance of

home

is constantly on the rise.In many states,having a

home

is more important than renting

one

for individuals.I think that owning a

home

is a positive situation.Considering

people

's freedom

as well as

the wish of owning a

home

will prove

this

. There are several reasons for many wanting to buy a and live in their own

home

One

of the reasons is that because of the inflation and housing crisis, the

rent

has increased significantly.

This

sometimes becomes unaffordable for common

people

to continue to pay the

rent

In addition

, it seems to be unfair to them to pay a huge amount of

rent

to cover someone else’s mortgage.

In contrast

people

can buy their

home

and use the

rent

money to pay off their own mortgage, resulting in owning an asset that can be passed on to their children. I think that

this

positive

Correct article usage

a positive

show examples

situation

due to

the following reasons.

Firstly

,the freedom of

people

is very important to them,when it comes to

home

For instance

,it is generally considered that

people

can do anything they want, without

Change preposition

apply

show examples

any interference from others.As well no

one

can possess the power to answer them.

In other words

,you can live in it

according to

your own decision.Unfortunately,

this

is a point that a renting

home

can not provide.

Therefore

this

makes it clear that being the owner of a house is more important than a renting

home

for

people

in some countries.

Secondly

, everyone has a wish to have a

home

For instance

,it is widely known that possessing a

home

this

inflation hits

Correct your spelling

inflation-hitting

show examples

world is

very

Rephrase

apply

show examples

vital for

people

.So,that they can look at other needs of life.Sadly,

this

favour is not provided by a charterhouse.

Thus

,it becomes apparent that owning a

home

is very important for

people

in some nations. In conclusion,having a

home

provides freedom

Change preposition

apply

show examples

them

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

and

everyoneone

Correct your spelling

everyone one

everyone

has a wish to have

Correct pronoun usage

one

show examples

As a result

it is clear that

owning a house is much more important than renting

one

.After

thorough

Add an article

a thorough

show examples

analysis of

this

topic,it is recommended that having a house is a positive situation and has its own importance for

people

than a charter

one

in many countries.

Submitted by jamalashraf45 on Mon Dec 11 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

The essay did cover the prompt and provided a stance on the situation about the importance of home ownership versus renting. However, the response could be more fully developed with clearer and more comprehensive explanations, and more persuasive arguments. The introduction should clearly outline the reasons to be discussed, and the body should explore these reasons in depth with supporting examples before drawing a clear conclusion. This will help in meeting task response criteria effectively.

coherence cohesion

The essay's structure is somewhat coherent, with recognizable paragraphs and an attempt at an introduction and conclusion. Nonetheless, transition phrases could be used more effectively to create a smooth flow between ideas. It is important to ensure that each paragraph has a central idea and that supporting sentences are related, directly extending the argument. To improve cohesion, the essay should include better signposting and logical sequencers to connect points and paragraphs seamlessly.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

360 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
More and more young people use the Internet to socialize. Why do you think young people prefer this way of socializing? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Nowadays, the Internet is the best way to connect with others. We only need one gadget to call or message someone, therefore, most teenagers prefer to use the Internet to make friends. I believe this is the best positive development because it saves time as well as we connect with others from anywhere. In addition, I will discuss the reasons young people use online sites for socializing.
5
band
Research show that business meetings discussions and training are happening online nowsdays.Do the advantage outweigh the disadvantages?
In current days , the organisation meetings and teachings are now done virtually and there are merits and demerits of using online platforms such as it is easy and quick to conduct a meeting , it hinders some of the ideas and practical skills if needed irrespectively.
5
band
Some people work for the same company or organisation during their whole working life why I don't see is dead. It is better to work for different companies discuss both views and give your opinion.
Over time, job choice has been based on individual preference. It is a subjective matter and could be different from person to person. However, a sizeable group of society believes that a lot of people want to toil in the same company for many years. While others emphasize that most people prefer being employed by different companies. I personally believe that individuals should have to take an opportunity which will come for better growth.
4.5
band
employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs personal information, such as their hobbies and inerests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The process of being accepted in one organization is for employers to go through the applicants' resumes. Some employers find personal information such as hobbies, interest, or even their relationship status important, whilst others find it is not useful to include such information. This essay agrees that personal data should be included in their resumes.
6.5
band
Modern technology, such as personal computers and the Internet, have made it possible for many people to do their work from home at least part of the time instead f going to an office every day. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Never before there in history, have there been so many advances in technology as right now.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

More and more young people use the Internet to socialize. Why do you think young people prefer this way of socializing? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Research show that business meetings discussions and training are happening online nowsdays.Do the advantage outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people work for the same company or organisation during their whole working life why I don't see is dead. It is better to work for different companies discuss both views and give your opinion.

employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs personal information, such as their hobbies and inerests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.