The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

#proportion #population #three #countries

The line graph compares the percentage of people aged 65 or more in the

USA

Japan

and

Sweden

from 1940 to 2040. In 2028Overall, it is immediately apparent from the chart

Japan

had a maximum number of residents aged 65 and more in the final year,

however

Sweden

and the

USA

also

followed the positive trend and population of senior adults search over the years.

To begin

with,the percentage of old people the age

beganat

Correct your spelling

began at

5% in

Japan

in 1920. After a few years, it decreased three times.

However

,in 2000 it grew in

Japan

. The proportion of 65 and above was the highest in the

USA

in 1940.

This

was twice as high as in

Sweden

and

Japan

. But in 2020

Japan

has grown out of

USA

and

Sweden

that is

, it reached 25%. Despite some deviations between them, the old age population in

Sweden

and the

USA

alsois

Correct your spelling

is is

estimated to rise, and by 2040, it

would

Wrong verb form

will

show examples

hit 25% respectively. The number of

Japan

's elderly population has skyrocketed by 2030,and 2040 remains the same. But, starting with very few arrows,

Japan

overtook everyone

Submitted by marina.parmenova on Mon Dec 11 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words usa, japan, sweden with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

180 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In theie advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

Computers and A.I technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience ? Is this a positive or negative development ?