The diagram below shows how instant noodiles are manufactured. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main feature and make comparisons where relevant.
This
diagram provide
the processing of Change the verb form
provides
noodles
in the factory basically starting from flour
until reach
packaging.
Correct subject-verb agreement
reaches
Overall
, we have Correct article usage
a totally
totally
Replace the word
total
eight
steps to preparing Change preposition
of eight
noodles
. However
it Add a comma
However,
begging
as harvest Verb problem
begins
flour
and it cross
into four minor steps before cooking and drying to get ready for selling Change the verb form
crosses
product
in proper packaging.
Correct article usage
the product
It is clear that
, firstly
there are two huge tube
for Storage silos which came from track as Change to a plural noun
tubes
flour
,
Next
step, is adding water and oil Correct article usage
The next
in
Change preposition
to
container
of the mixture and putting on the rollers Correct article usage
the container
on
order to create the dough sheet which is Change preposition
in
smoothly
in appearance following, it will convert Change the word
smooth
them
into strips to get ready for making Correct pronoun usage
apply
noodles
discs in circle
shape . In Add an article
a circle
heater
sink cooking the crop with oil. So far it Correct article usage
the heater
make
them Wrong verb form
has made
drying
.
Papering the Change the form of the verb
dry
arrange
cups into two paralleling Wrong verb form
arranged
line
adding the vegetables and spices. Change to a plural noun
lines
Whereas packaging
is the Correct word choice
Packaging
last
stage, it provided
the labelling and sealing of Wrong verb form
provides
this
product.
the noodles
as flour
which carried in track.
Cooking by using oil then
drying
Before labels packaging in the cupsCorrect word choice
and then
Submitted by M on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the seventh paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the eighth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words noodles, flour with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "provide" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the seventh paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the eighth paragraph.
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