Some companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
In recent years, there have been numerous people arguing
about
Change preposition
that
companies
that used
advertising to reach wide audiences Wrong verb form
use
is
good. On the other side, they think it will Correct subject-verb agreement
are
give
Verb problem
have
negative
impact Correct article usage
a negative
especailly
in Correct your spelling
especially
sports
. I agree to some extent because it will bring numerous positives to companies
, however
, having a lot of sponsorship could disturb sports
Correct article usage
the sports
team
's focus and bring negative impacts to the team
.
There are several advantages to support this
statement. Companies
who are benefited
the most in Wrong verb form
benefit
this
situation which it
can help to boost their product sales. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Companies
use sports
sponsorship to gain wide audiences, improve their brand visibility, and align their products with the positive image of sports
. Moreover
, sponsorship also
give
financial backing that can help Change the verb form
gives
sports
team
to keep continuing. In addition
, athletes will have broaden
opportunities in their future Wrong verb form
broadened
career
when they are Fix the agreement mistake
careers
are got
exposed Verb problem
apply
from
good Change preposition
to
companies
.
However
, being exposed with
Change preposition
to
comercial
Correct your spelling
commercial
brand
would detract from the Fix the agreement mistake
brands
enjoymemnt
of Correct your spelling
enjoyment
sports
fans and alter the focus from the sport to the brands. In addition
, companies
will use sports
sponsorships to cover the negatives in their business and it can bring disadvantages to sports
teams in the future.
For example
, if company's
products are not Correct article usage
the company's
satisfied
enough Replace the word
satisfying
for
customers, the company would use Change preposition
apply
sports
to boost their sale
, because they know their fans would purchase everything that their idol used.
In conclusion, there are benefits and drawbacks in Fix the agreement mistake
sales
this
situation. In my opinion, having sponsor
Add an article
a sponsor
is
can help Unnecessary verb
apply
sports
team's
Fix the agreement mistake
teams'
financial
, and they Replace the word
finances
got
exposed in the commercial market, Wrong verb form
get
however
it Add a comma
however,
also
can bring negatives impact if there were
Wrong verb form
are
to
many Replace the word
too
sporsors
.Correct your spelling
sponsors
Submitted by gladysdharmawan1994 on
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structure
Your essay lacks a clear structure, making it challenging to follow. Ensure you have a proper introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, with each paragraph having a clear central idea.
clarity
Work on the clarity of your ideas. Make sure each paragraph follows on logically from the last, with clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.
task response
In your response, you need to ensure that you address all parts of the task. This includes discussing both viewpoints thoroughly and providing a clear opinion. While you attempted to do this, more detailed development and relevant examples were needed to support your points effectively.
coherence
Your coherence would benefit from better use of cohesive devices and transition words to guide the reader from one idea to another more seamlessly.
specific examples
Include more specific examples to illustrate and support your points. Vague references make your argument less persuasive and your essay will benefit from concrete examples that relate closely to the points you are making.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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