Success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person
Some societies think that getting an achievement is about having
much
money and various materials. Even though, many aspects of Correct quantifier usage
a lot of
people
are honoured as a
successful Correct article usage
apply
person
. I ensure that there is Fix the agreement mistake
people
other
way to be regarded as successful.
I believe that money is not always a primary indicator of Change the wording
another
a
Remove the article
apply
success
. For instance
, a man who liable
to Add a missing verb
is liable
executing
several tasks in their job can be taught as a successful Wrong verb form
execute
person
, because he can handle many
problems than Correct quantifier usage
more
the
others. Correct article usage
apply
As a result
, other employees may considerably reward this
person
as a successful employee because he will get higher responsibility and higher
position Correct article usage
a higher
since
his outstanding performance. Change preposition
for
Therefore
, being serious in working can be taught as a success
.
There is a perspective that considering
Wrong verb form
considers
people
as a
successful Correct article usage
apply
person
. Fix the agreement mistake
people
Firstly
, a smart person
who can communicate effortlessly have
a chance to become a successful Correct subject-verb agreement
has
person
. Not only by their knowledge, but they can also
attract people
by persuading them to hear what their idea is. In a seminar; For example
, the reason why people
want to join a seminar because
a speaker of Add a missing verb
is because
those event
. Society believes that joining a seminar can be fruitful because they will hear about a certain knowledge brought by the speaker. Change the determiner
that event
those events
Moreover
, they may known as a
rich Correct article usage
apply
people
outside the event, but it
is not the reason why Correct pronoun usage
that
people
admire
. Generally; Correct pronoun usage
admire them
thus
, clever
society can be taught as a Correct article usage
a clever
success
.
In conclusion, the community usually determines money as an important factor of success
. However
, some successful stories written
with Add a missing verb
were written
other event
. I believe that Change the wording
another event
other events
successful
is about how to maintain certain liabilities both in the industrial neighbourhood and Replace the word
success
citizen’s
life. Other societies Change preposition
in citizen’s
also
determine achievement can be obtain
by becoming a smart Change the verb form
be obtained
person
.Submitted by re.li on
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Coherence/Cohesion
Ensure that the introduction directly addresses the essay question with a clear stance and establish a thesis statement that guides the reader on your perspective on wealth and success. The conclusion should restate your main points and firmly cement your argument.
Coherence/Cohesion
Organize your ideas into clear, logical paragraphs with topic sentences. Transition smoothly between sentences and paragraphs to guide readers through your argument. Use a variety of linking words effectively to improve the flow.
Coherence/Cohesion
Develop each main point with detailed explanations and relevant examples. Make sure each paragraph has one clear main idea and support it with evidence.
Task Achievement
Address all parts of the prompt. The response should fully answer the question of whether wealth is the best measure of success and what makes a person successful. Provide an in-depth exploration of your position on success without diverting into tangential discussions.
Task Achievement
Present ideas clearly and elaborate on them comprehensively. Avoid vague or general statements by explaining your points in depth. Use specific examples to substantiate your arguments.
Task Achievement
Use examples that are directly relevant to your argument about success. The examples should clearly illustrate the point you are making and be specific enough to support your thesis effectively.
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