As life expectancy is increasing, people work after retirement with pay. Alternatively, some people start to work at a young age. Are these positive or negative impacts?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is considered that individuals'

life

Use synonyms

durations are rising, and they devote their lives to their

work

Use synonyms

with a salary.

Therefore

Linking Words

, most of them start working at an early

age

Use synonyms

According to

Linking Words

my opinion, these trends have detrimental effects on human beings because they don't have time for relaxation, and

also

Linking Words

face difficulty in finding jobs for the young generation.

Secondly

Linking Words

, the youth

also

Linking Words

lose their concentration from their studies

although

Linking Words

it is beneficial for them as they gain experience it ruins their studies schedule. I will discuss

this

Linking Words

in detail in the essay below.

To begin

Linking Words

with, as the lifecycle of most people is showing an upward trend, their

work

Use synonyms

efficacy

also

Linking Words

increases.

Hence

Linking Words

they continue to do their task after the legal

age

Use synonyms

of retirement so, they do not feel relaxed as most of the time they have given to their

work

Use synonyms

to save

money

Use synonyms

and live a happy

life

Use synonyms

Instead

Linking Words

of living a joyful

life

Use synonyms

, they are under the stress of doing

work

Use synonyms

without thinking of their health and when the time comes, they become lethargic and weak physically and are unable to enjoy themselves fully.

However

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

affects the rate of employment for a youngster as they are still in a working position so they are unable to get that seat,

therefore

Linking Words

they prefer to move abroad and leave their nation for the sake of a better future. As in most Asian countries, like in Pakistan adults are leaving their motherland

due to

Linking Words

a shortage of

work

Use synonyms

rate. On the flipside, there are some positive factors

also

Linking Words

as it enhances the experience of the young individuals but the meantime distracts them from studies.

Consequently

Linking Words

, they start to do part-time jobs to earn some

money

Use synonyms

hence

Linking Words

they lose stability on their academic side and try to make

money

Use synonyms

and think of saving it to enjoy in the end.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, by engaging themselves in

work

Use synonyms

they remain fit and fine not physically but

also

Linking Words

mentally when they are at the

age

Use synonyms

of retirement they feel bored and

hence

Linking Words

become a patient with dementia.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is good to indulge themselves in doing

work

Use synonyms

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

not only for the sake of saving

money

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, I understand that there are merits and demerits of doing

work

Use synonyms

at a late

age

Use synonyms

but, I think that the weight of working at a late

age

Use synonyms

is higher

hence

Linking Words

harming

life

Use synonyms

as well as

Linking Words

for the new generation.

aimenmalik2021Tue Dec 12 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that the essay includes a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Introduction and conclusion should establish and summarize your position and main points.

coherence cohesion

Develop clear and logical paragraphing with appropriate use of linking words to guide the reader through the arguments presented.

coherence cohesion

Support main points with relevant, detailed, and specific examples that illustrate the argument effectively.

task achievement

Address the task by presenting a balanced view on the positive and negative impacts, ensuring that all parts of the prompt are answered comprehensively.

task achievement

Express ideas clearly and comprehensively, making sure each paragraph contributes effectively to the overall argument.

task achievement

Include a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to add precision and variety to your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

406 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
18.Education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It can be argued that the vast majority of countries support child apprenticeships instead of mature individuals who believe that the ruling powers should waste public funds on them. Personally, I strongly disagree with this view as the future of the country depends on young people. Nevertheless, adults also have a role to play in regional development. This article will illustrate the perspectives of both sides and provide anecdotal evidence to support these arguments.
8
band
Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, climate change is one of the most severe problems in the world and needs to be prevented. However, some suggest that rather than finding a solution, we should construct a way to live with it. In my opinion, this problem should be addressed seriously, but we also need an alternative plan after everything else fails.
4.5
band
Some people think government should spent money on languages that are dying and a few number of people uses them, some think this is a waste of resources. Discuss both views and tell what's your take on this issue.
Some people argued about spending of the government money on languages that are dying. While some of them think it is waste for funds, I believe that is more important to keep money for providing better environment for nations instead.
<4
band
The hart below gives information about the age of women in Australia when they gave birth to their first child in 1966, 1986 and 2006.
The bar graph illustrates information about the age of female in Australia when they gave life for their first child in 1966, 1986 and 2006.
5
band
Many people think technological devices such as smartphones, tablets and mobile phones bring more disadvantages than advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent years many people have tended to use technology more than before. Some people would argue that technological devices have more usefulness than beneficial applications, However, in my opinion, every individual can decide whether to use these devices or not. There are two principal responses.

As life expectancy is increasing, people work after retirement with pay. Alternatively, some people start to work at a young age. Are these positive or negative impacts?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

18.Education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think government should spent money on languages that are dying and a few number of people uses them, some think this is a waste of resources. Discuss both views and tell what's your take on this issue.

The hart below gives information about the age of women in Australia when they gave birth to their first child in 1966, 1986 and 2006.

Many people think technological devices such as smartphones, tablets and mobile phones bring more disadvantages than advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?