It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantageous of taking risks outweigh the disadvantageous?

Risk
-taking indeed has a crucial effect on our career and personal life choices.
Although
there are some defects in our health, I strongly believe that
risk
-taking has far more pluses in our growth. One of the main drawbacks of taking high-stakes professional
risks
is the potential cause of health issues
such
as stress and anxiety. The main reason for
this
phenomenon is that the body tends to release high amounts of special hormones in the
risk
-taking process, especially if the
risk
is uncalculated and the outcome is uncertain. These hormones prompt an increase in the heart rate and blood pressure, persistent elevation of which can cause chronic stress and heart problems.
For instance
, a significant amount of gamblers, who are constant
risk
takers, are having cardio problems
as well as
problems with depression.
That is
why most of them in the end are becoming broke and live much smaller compared to others, which is making a lot of people believe that it is not worth taking
risks
at all.
However
, if the
risks
are taken correctly and are certain it can have major benefits in the learning and growth process of the person. Taking
risks
often requires a person to step outside of their comfort zone and face new challenges and experiences. To overcome those hurdles person will need to acquire new skills, and push himself to the limit of his abilities, seeing the true potential of his abilities. With
this
type of
risk
, people
are gaining
Wrong verb form
gain
show examples
valuable experiences, fostering professional development developing resilience, and building confidence in life’s uncertainties which in the future can lead to potential success. Indeed, the majority of successful entrepreneurs took many high-stakes
risks
throughout their careers.
For example
, Elon Musk at the start of his career spent most of his money on launching SpaceX taking a huge financial
risk
. In conclusion, despite some negligible downsides of
risk
-taking on health, I strongly believe that the benefits of
risks
on our growth
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
far exceed these downsides.
Thus
, we shouldn’t fear taking
risks
but
instead
take more often to foster our development.
Submitted by abdullaevayt on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Make sure the introduction provides a clear viewpoint in response to the essay prompt. The conclusion should restate this viewpoint and summarize the main arguments clearly without introducing new ideas.
complete response
Consider elaborating further on how the advantages of risk-taking could outweigh the disadvantages, ensuring that the reader is left with a compelling argument in favor of your stance.
supported main points
Strive to develop your main points more thoroughly. Provide more detailed explanations and examples to strengthen each argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are directly answering the essay question with a definitive opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Use these sections to unequivocally guide the reader towards your viewpoint.
relevant specific examples
Use a wider variety of examples from different contexts to solidify your points about risk-taking. Rather than only speaking broadly about entrepreneurs, consider including examples from different professions and aspects of personal life to illustrate your points.
logical structure
To enhance coherence, work on transitioning between ideas more smoothly. Use linking words and phrases to better connect paragraphs and ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that signals its main idea.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
Look at other essays: