Some people say that it is not possible to be happy without money, while others think that money does not guarantee happiness. Discuss both the views and give your own opinion.
It is truly said that
money
softens the blow but cannot prevent it. Happiness
and money
belong to two different worlds and if
they are complementary or contrary is a matter of subjective viewpoint.
Those who believe that Correct word choice
whether
money
is the ultimate source and supporter of happiness
lacks
the emotional quotient in Correct subject-verb agreement
lack
thier
life. Correct your spelling
their
Thet
cite Correct your spelling
They
money
being the resource of their smile and good relations with other but lesser
they know that most of their relationships are built only on the supply of Correct word choice
apply
money
and lacks emotional conectedness
. There can be certain situations Correct your spelling
connection
also
that can be certain situations
Remove the redundancy
apply
also
that can make some people
hyperdependent
on Correct your spelling
hyper dependent
hyper-dependent
money
. May be
their childhood was full of financial Correct your spelling
Maybe
crisis
despite having Fix the agreement mistake
crises
full
fledge family that converted their belief regarding Add an article
a full
happiness
.
On the reverse side, certain people
consider that detachment of
Change preposition
from
happiness
and money
is good. They think that money
cannot guarantee happiness
or long term
healthy relationships. If we view the world around us, we can see wealthy Add a hyphen
long-term
people
having tons of money
crying and starving for real heart to heart
Add a hyphen
heart-to-heart
relation
that can provide real Fix the agreement mistake
relations
happiness
. Money
can guarantee people
around you but not the real one or those who truly care for you. These people
may not win financially but their chances of winning at
life are greater.
If Change preposition
in
i
take into account my opinion, I would choose Change the capitalization
I
happiness
over money
and would like to let go money
in return Change preposition
of money
of
true relationships and real Change preposition
for
happiness
.Submitted by deepayadav596 on
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structure
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis statement. Body paragraphs should expand on your viewpoints with supporting arguments. The conclusion should summarise your points and restate your opinion.
language
Work on creating more complex sentence structures and use a range of linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
content
Provide specific examples to support your views. This adds credibility to your arguments and demonstrates an understanding of the topic.
accuracy
Pay attention to spelling, punctuation, and grammar to avoid errors that can hinder the essay's clarity and impact.
position
Make sure your position is clear throughout the response and particularly in the conclusion.
repetition
Avoid repeating ideas, introduce new perspectives or insights in separate paragraphs.
development
Clarify and develop the main points in each paragraph more extensively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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