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It is generally believed some people are born with certain talents, for instant for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #talents #instant #sport #music #child #sports #person #musician
It is generally thought that some
people
born
Add a missing verb
are born
show examples
 with
God
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God's
show examples
 gift in certain things,
however
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however,
show examples
 some
people
 numerous
people
 become better in
such
 quality. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I will discuss both views and
put
Verb problem
give
show examples
 my opinion. To
began
Change the form of the verb
begin
show examples
,some
people
 become good in many
field
Change the noun form
fields
show examples
 like sports and music.
Firstly
, when a
person
practice
Change the verb form
practices
show examples
 many
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
many time he becomes a good
person
 in his field because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 practice
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 a man perfect .
For example
, two to three years before one of my brothers
don't
Wrong verb form
didn't
show examples
 show good performance in our village
football
due to
 lack of enough practice.
Then
 he start working
hardly
Change the word
hard
show examples
 every day about 3 to 4 hours per day.Now he
have
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has
show examples
 some good
characters
Fix the agreement mistake
character
show examples
 in
football
due to
 his hard
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
as a result
 he selected
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 our village
football
 team.
Secondly
, when a
person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 family
support
then
 he
became
Wrong verb form
becomes
show examples
 a good
person
. Because without family
support
 cannot achieve his big .If parents and family cannot
support
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 child
then
 how he become
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 Player or singer
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
A survey
lounched
Correct your spelling
launched
 the government of Pakistan about successful
people
 in Karachi, the result
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 that 87
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
successful
Add a missing verb
are successful
show examples
due to
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
parents
Change noun form
parent's
parents'
show examples
support
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand,some
people
 are born
many
Change preposition
with many
show examples
 skills.
Firstly
,their mind is good
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
 a result they become good
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 sports and music.
Secondly
,
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
 physical style is fit with certain activities.
For instance
, sometimes a
person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 good skills in cricket but not in
football
. To
Correct your spelling
conclude
concude
Correct your spelling
conclude
, it seems to me that it is
natural
Add an article
a natural
show examples
 process anyone can't buy
this
Submitted by Abidhussainabid753 on

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Task Achievement
Task Achievement: You attempted to address the prompt, but your response is underdeveloped and lacks elaboration. Ensure that both views and your own opinion are fully expressed and expanded upon with clear, specific arguments and examples. Strive to provide a complete and in-depth discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: Your essay demonstrates issues with clarity and logical sequencing. Make use of clear paragraphing with each paragraph presenting a central idea, supported by cohesive devices. Check for frequent spelling and grammar errors, which hinder coherence.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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