IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The charts summarise the weight measurements of people living in Charlestown in 1955 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The charts summarise the weight measurements of people living in Charlestown in 1955 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#summarise #weight #measurements #people #charlestown #information #features #comparisons
The charts show data about the
weight
 measurements of
inhabitants
 living in Charlestown in 1955 and 2015.
Overall
, in both
age
 ranges of 20-29, the
inhabitants
 of Charlestown in 1955 and 2015 had a high
percentage
 of ideal
weight
. A deep analysis of the bar charts provided reveals the
weight
 of
inhabitants
 of Charlestown in 2015 in the
age
range
 20-29 is ideal with about 70%.
In contrast
, the
age
range
 60-69 shows a high proportion of
people
 obese with about 60%. Meanwhile, the
percentage
 of
people
 obese increases following the
age
range
 from 20-29 to 60-69. It is noticeable that in 1955
inhabitants
 of all ages have an ideal
weight
 and the highest
also
 is the
age
range
 20-29 with around 70%.
In addition
, the
percentage
 of underweight
people
 was more than the
percentage
 of underweight
inhabitants
 in 2015.
Besides
, the proportion of
people
 overweight in 1955 was lower than in 2015.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words weight, inhabitants, age, percentage, range, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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