Nowadays people move from one country to another for work Some people think children of these families suffer because of this while others think it is helpful for them Discuss views and give your opinion
Workless
Replace the word
Worklessness
is make
several Change the verb form
makes
peoples
move to another country in today's world. But Fix the agreement mistake
people
this
Correct determiner usage
these
statments
Correct your spelling
statements
appears
Correct subject-verb agreement
appear
Change preposition
to defferent
defferent
ideas for Correct your spelling
different
people
about it's
helpful or not for their Correct word choice
whether it's
children
. In my view indeed workless is reason
Correct article usage
the reason
to
Change preposition
for
this
and another one
reason is Correct pronoun usage
apply
lack
of salaries for their Correct article usage
the lack
children
and families
On the one hand in my opinion some people
think right, because their whose
Correct pronoun usage
apply
children
are miss
them namely their
Change the verb form
miss
children
although
men are go
Change the verb form
go
another
country than women. It is harmful Change preposition
to another
for
their Change the preposition
to
encourage
. Replace the word
encouragement
For
example
Add a comma
example,
a
interview Change the article
an
is
shown by Wrong verb form
was
jurnalists
on TV yesterday. It is very Correct your spelling
journalists
unpleasan
for Correct your spelling
unpleasant
people
. Then
again the
Correct article usage
apply
life
is not long as some people
think. They spend their life
in dark
without Add an article
the dark
father
and without Fix the agreement mistake
fathers
children
.
On the
Remove the article
apply
another
handCorrect quantifier usage
other
Add a comma
,
people
believe that it is good for children
and their life
which
in the future Because they will grow up without trouble and any Correct pronoun usage
apply
challanges
when their parents Correct your spelling
challenges
work
for
their studies and it Change preposition
on
doesnt
matter for Correct your spelling
doesn't
life
despite become
far. Wrong verb form
becoming
Then
their children
will not work
like themselves. So Children
have got their good work
in the future. For Correct your spelling
instance
Correct your spelling
instance
insteance
a person Add a comma
insteance,
have
worked Change the verb form
has
in
abroad a lot but he is very old and he and his Change preposition
apply
cheldren
have got enough Correct your spelling
children
Correct your spelling
opportunities
opportunaties
to make everything Correct your spelling
opportunities
especially
for his Add the comma(s)
, especially
children
are luckly
.
In conclusion Correct your spelling
luckily
lucky
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
should work
despite
Change preposition
in
places
. Correct article usage
the places
However
expert
say that the person should Fix the agreement mistake
experts
wok
with Correct your spelling
work
break
.Add an article
a break
the break
Also
Add a comma
Also,
agan
they claim that Correct your spelling
again
Work
time is normal 8 hours for eldest
.
Shodiyeva MohinurCorrect article usage
the eldest
Submitted by gulnozashermatovna0225 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clarity with multiple grammar errors and sentence fragments that make it difficult to understand. Introduction and conclusion are not clearly distinguished. Make sure that the essay has a clear introductory paragraph that presents the topic and your thesis statement, as well as a conclusion that summarizes the main points and restates your opinion.
task achievement
The essay partially addresses the task, but the arguments are not fully developed, and there is a lack of relevant supporting examples. Focus on fully developing your arguments with clear topic sentences for each paragraph and supporting them with specific examples or data.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.