The diagrams below show the site of a school in 2004 and the plan for changes to the school site in 2024.

#diagrams #show #site #school #plan #changes

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The map below illustrates the location of schools in 2004 and the program for changes that have been considered until 2024. It can be seen that

Remove the comma

apply

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the most significant changes would be

added

Wrong verb form

adding

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another

school

building and

second

Correct article usage

a second

show examples

parking lot.

Also

Add a comma

Also,

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the changes exceeded the student's attendance in 2024. In 2004, the proportion of students were 600 and there were two

school

buildings where

Change preposition

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different

Add an article

a different

the different

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side of the path.

also

, there

were

Change the verb form

was

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sport

Change the noun form

sports

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field building

at the end

of the route connected to the main entrance where there was a parking lot next to it. In 2024, the population of pupils is anticipated to reach 1000 through the replacement

sport

Change the noun form

sports

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field building with the third

school

building. Original buildings will be

joint

Correct your spelling

joined

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together and connected with the new building through a path. The second parking lot will be constructed that would connect the main gate with a road which is behind the

school

building 2 and There would be

Correct article usage

a sport

show examples

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

field across that road next to the car park 2 which caused some deforestation.

Submitted by jpmahshid on Thu Dec 14 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words school with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.

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2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

176 words

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The diagrams below show the site of a school in 2004 and the plan for changes to the school site in 2024.

Technology is becoming progressively universal. In the fullness of time, classroom teachers will be totally substituted for technology. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease. government should focus on reducing evironmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree

It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture.We can learn as much as from boks, films, and the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people suggest that the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?