Government spend millions of dollars each year on their space programmes Most recently Mars is the focus of scientists attention' . Some people think this money would be better spent on dealing with closer to home. Do you agree or disagree?

Dear John, I'm very much
greatful
Correct your spelling
grateful
to have you as my beloved friend and
also
coming
Change preposition
for coming
show examples
to seek advice from me on your driving school plan. Having a driving license independently and
also
being able to drive can give you a
Sense
Fix capitalization
sense
show examples
of autonomy, allowing you to take control of your own transport needs.and
also
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
flexibility to change your plans or alter your schedule at
a moments
Correct the article-noun agreement
a moment
moments
show examples
. I will like to recommend
easy
Correct article usage
an easy
show examples
way driving school for you. is one of the best driving
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
in town it is affordable in price and
also
their driving instructors are very good
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
teaching
an amateurs
Correct the article-noun agreement
amateurs
an amateur
show examples
very well.it is located at No 24
ajao
Change the capitalization
Ajao
show examples
estate near
first gate hotel
Correct your spelling
First Gate Hotel
show examples
. Once you register with them and
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
show examples
your payment always obey their rules and regulations from the driving instructors I strongly believe you won't
regrets
Correct subject-verb agreement
regret
show examples
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
learning from them I
wished
Wrong verb form
wish
show examples
you
Goodluck
Correct your spelling
good luck
show examples
. Best wishes Somadina
Submitted by somadinamelete on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The letter provided does not adhere to the IELTS essay question posed regarding government spending on space programmes versus addressing issues closer to home. It is crucial to provide a response that directly addresses the question asked in order to meet the task achievement criteria.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a coherent structure as it does not contain a clear introduction, supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion. Ensure that your essay has a logical order and clear paragraphing that helps to develop the argument effectively.
coherence cohesion
The given text is a personal letter rather than an essay. It is important to understand and follow the format of an IELTS essay, which includes an introduction, at least two main body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: