In many modern societies, grandchildren rarely spend any quality time with thier grandparents. What do you think are the consequences of this?

Love and peace
makes
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make
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house
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a house
the house
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a home. Grandparents or
ancestrols
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ancestors
are the pillar of our homes. Nowadays,
due to
modernisation, youngsters rarely spend valuable time with them. We have elaborated
the
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on the
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causes and consequences of
this
problem in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
, the age gap between the young ones and their
granparents
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grandparents
is a prominent cause.
Then
, there is always a lack of understanding among them.
Secondly
, in
current
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the current
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era, busy academic
schedule
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schedules
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and excessive usage of technology
such
as
,
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apply
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mobile phones,
ipads
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iPads
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, etcetera by offsprings . Technology has a negative impact on child's brain growth and
deplet
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depletes
their etiquettes.
Consequently
, modern
child
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children
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become
ill- mannered
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ill-mannered
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as they always demand
for
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apply
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a personal space.
Moreover
, the adjustment factor has no existence in their lives. They do not have any cultural ethics
as well as
moral values.
However
, the children become annoying as they
use
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used
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to argue with their parents as well.
In addition
to
this
, if they have
communication
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a communication
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gap with grandparents ,
then
, they are unable to make important decisions .
Furthermore
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Furthermore,
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they are unable to decide between good and bad.
To conclude
with
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apply
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, we believe that
the
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apply
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youngsters must have quality scheduled time for communicating with their parents and family. They should remember the fact that family is a significant support system.
Submitted by kaurmohinder343 on

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coherence cohesion
There is minimal use of cohesive devices and the essay structure follows a basic format; but lacks a clear progression of ideas. The introduction and conclusion are present but could be more developed to effectively introduce and conclude the topic.
task achievement
The essay somewhat addresses the task, yet it does not fully develop all parts of the prompt. The response needs to be more detailed and focused on the specific consequences of the lack of interaction between grandchildren and grandparents rather than a general critique on modern children's behavior.
lexical resource
Try to employ a wider range of vocabulary to convey precise meanings, and work on sentence structure to improve readability. Avoid repetition of words and phrases.
grammatical range accuracy
Grammatical range and accuracy need improvement. There are basic grammatical errors present, and sentence structures are often simple or repetitive. Practice complex sentence structures and pay careful attention to subject-verb agreement and proper usage of articles.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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