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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph shows data about the annual earnings of three bakeries in London, between 2000 and 2010. Summarize information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph shows data about the annual earnings of three bakeries in London, between 2000 and 2010. Summarize information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph illustrates the yearly income of three bakeries in
london
Change the capitalization
London
show examples
 from 2000 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,the line stayed
in
Change preposition
apply
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constant in 2000-2005
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 Robbie's Bakery and it
was decreasing
Wrong verb form
decreased
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 in Lovely Loaves,
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add the comma(s)
hand,
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 it
was increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 in Bernie's Buns. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Robbie's Bakery after 2005
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
show examples
 started growing up in 2010
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
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 had over 100,000 and it is the highest earns of them in 2010,
however
Linking Words
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Bernie's Buns
bakery
Capitalize word
Bakery
show examples
 it wasn't changed from 2003 to 2006
then
Linking Words
 it began peaking.
While
Linking Words
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Lovely Loaves
it was
Verb problem
has
show examples
remain
Wrong verb form
remained
show examples
 stable for the
last
Linking Words
 three years.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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