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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018.

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018.
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The bar graph shows
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the weekly expenses of
families
Use synonyms
 in one country. The data compare figures of their weekly revenues to their daily necessities recorded between 1968 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
,in 1968,
food
Use synonyms
 consumption had the highest proportion among
families
Use synonyms
 spending their income every week in certain countries.
Whereas
Linking Words
, in 2018, most of the family spent their money on leisure activities. It is
also
Linking Words
 clear that in both years, fuel and power had the lowest percentage of
families
Use synonyms
 allocated their weekly allowance. In detail, In 1968, every family spent the greatest proportion of their weekly allowance on
food
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 items, accounting for 35%. Followed by housing at 10%, clothing and footwear at 10%, and leisure activities at around 9%.
Whereas
Linking Words
, similar rates were observed in household goods, personal goods, and transport, sharing 7.5% each, which is more than five times as much recorded in
food
Use synonyms
 items.Meanwhile, fuel and power are seen to be the least among
families
Use synonyms
, spending less from their weekly income. A different pattern can be observed in 2018, every family in the country allocated their weekly allowance for one week in leisure activities, around 22%, closely followed by housing at approximately 18% and
food
Use synonyms
 at roughly 17%, nearly followed by transport, accounting for around 14%.
whereas
Linking Words
 clothing accounts for exactly 5% and a similar proportion among personal goods, fuel and power contribute approximately 4%, which is the every family's spent less from their weekly income.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words families, food with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Weekly income
  • Expenditure
  • Consumption patterns
  • Cost of living
  • Discretionary spending
  • Inflation
  • Economic indicators
  • Demographics
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Technology advancements
  • Government policies
  • Consumerism
  • Lifestyle changes
  • Fiscal habits
  • Budget allocation
  • Financial priorities
  • Societal trends
  • Purchasing power
  • Income distribution
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