In recent years, people have paid attention to preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. However, others think it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. To what extend, do you agree or disagree with this point?

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Some individuals believe that being a responsible visitor is hard to achieve,
although
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human beings have shown positive changes in their attitudes towards preserving the
culture
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and environment of the places they travel to.
This
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essay aims to explain why I completely disagree with
this
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idea.
Firstly
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, local organizations managing tourist attractions have implemented strict regulations.
For example
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, Seoul is considered one of the most attractive destination cities in the world. Despite the large number of
tourists
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visiting every year, its historical sites and civilizations remain intact.
This
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success can be attributed to the comprehensive laws enforced by the Seoul authorities, which ensure that
tourists
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follow the rules and contribute to the preservation of the city's
culture
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and tourist sites. Other popular destinations
such
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as Bali or Bangkok have
also
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made improvements by implementing laws to regulate
tourists
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' behaviour.
Secondly
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, modern-day visitors are more conscious of the importance of preserving both the
culture
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and the places they visit. Education about cultural and indigenous knowledge has made them value cultural heritage more, resulting in a conscious effort to avoid damaging these precious sites.
For instance
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,
according to
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a study conducted by a national newspaper, 90% of travellers admit that they now feel more responsible for actively participating in the protection of the values of the places they are exploring. In conclusion, despite the scepticism surrounding
tourists
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' responsibility to preserve the
culture
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and environment they visit, I hold the opposing view that travellers' behaviours have changed for the better. It is estimated that if proponents of
this
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optimistic idea remain open-minded, we will not only be able to conserve cultural heritage but
also
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foster the development of the travel industry.
Submitted by nguyenmysam722001 on

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coherence cohesion
It is essential to structure your essay in a way that flows logically from one point to the next. While your essay shows an adequate logical structure, strive to create smoother transitions between points to improve readability.
coherence cohesion
While you effectively included an introduction and conclusion as part of your essay structure, continue to refine these elements by clearly restating your position in the conclusion to reinforce it to the reader.
coherence cohesion
Your essay needs to develop main points with more depth. You have provided some detail, but aim to include more varied and elaborate supporting information to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
You successfully addressed the prompt and provided a complete response to the task. Your position is clear and extends throughout the essay. However, enhancing the depth of your argument could further improve this score.
task achievement
Your essay expresses clear ideas that are relevant to the prompt. To score higher, deepen your analysis of the topic and expand on the ideas with comprehensive explanations.
task achievement
Using specific examples is commendable and supports your arguments. Aim to include more detailed examples and evidence to enhance the persuasiveness of your essay. Drawing on broader sources could also improve this aspect.
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