Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Recently, a
growining
issue regarding Correct your spelling
growing
health
problems has taken sharp
curve. Correct article usage
a sharp
people
are trying to use medicines and tablets which they think as a
alternative source for their Change the article
an
health
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
instead
contacting
medical Change preposition
of contacting
professional
. Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
This
essay will discuss some of the reasons why i
completely think its negative Change the capitalization
I
Correct your spelling
development
developemnt
Correct your spelling
development
to begin
with, every madicines
have its side effect when not read its description properly before using it Correct your spelling
medicines
medicine
this
is because firstly
, some people
do not have a proper educational background so they rely on local citizen instead
of consulting doctors
for that
they trust them blindly and faced set side back when used. same with the case of having Correct word choice
whom
a
treatment without contacting healthcare they just wrap it around with Remove the article
apply
twizzer
and plaster Correct your spelling
tweezer
for instance
, report
Correct article usage
a report
have
been Change the verb form
has
publish
in Change the verb form
publishing
published
Change the capitalization
India
india
, around 67% of the Change the capitalization
India
people
faced health
issue due negative
impact on them by using alternative tablets which causes paralyzing their bodies Change preposition
to negative
thus
, a
strict action should be taken by the government to aware Remove the article
apply
people
with basic knowledge of using medicines
on the other hand
, patients instead
of using home remedies for their treatment they
ought to consult Correct pronoun usage
apply
doctors
and health
staff. this
is due to
the fact that,
they know how to deal with certain Remove the comma
apply
treatment
when occur which require professional studying and expertise Fix the agreement mistake
treatments
such
as,
bone Remove the comma
apply
fracture
, torn muscles Fix the agreement mistake
fractures
and
body aches etc take Correct word choice
apply
an
example of Correct article usage
the
jack maa
(CEO of Alibaba ) who had been involved with lukiemia undergo many therapies Correct your spelling
Jack Maa
according to
professionals doctors
and defeated the virus with iron hand. hence
, expert doctors
and health
staff perform a key role when dealing or
treating their patients
to sum it up, Change preposition
with or
although
many individuals have Correct word choice
apply
Add an article
the mind
a mind
mind set
of solving their Correct your spelling
mindset
health
issues by buying the
alternative Correct article usage
apply
madicines
rather than taking Correct your spelling
medicines
medicine
precription
from Correct your spelling
prescription
prescriptions
doctors
. i
strongly believe that healthcare consultation and using medicines that are Change the capitalization
I
Add a hyphen
pass-through
pass
through by professionals will only Wrong verb form
passed
benefits
your bodyChange the verb form
benefit
Submitted by abdulahad08600 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear and logical structure. Introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion should each have a distinct purpose and flow logically from one to the other. Aim for a more cohesive argument where each point builds on the last.
Coherence & Cohesion
Proofread your essay to check for any grammatical or spelling errors. Additionally, strive to use a variety of sentence structures and make sure your paragraphs are cohesive, with one main idea per paragraph that is expanded upon with supporting details.
Task Achievement
Be sure to fully address all parts of the task. The essay should provide a clear position throughout the response, with a conclusion that summarizes the topic effectively. Use specific examples to support your points, and ensure that your argument is comprehensive and persuasive.
Task Achievement
Avoid repeating ideas and ensure that the main points are supported by specific examples or evidence. Stay on topic and ensure that every sentence contributes to your argument or provides relevant information.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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