Some people think that governments should pay for people’s education and health care, while others believe that it is not governments’ responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

A school of thought holds that

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

should spend money in the budget on education and basic health care for

citizens

Use synonyms

whereas

Linking Words

the alternative stand asserts that it is not necessary. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss both viewpoints and give my reasons why I believe solving

this

Linking Words

argument

with

Change preposition

show examples

an equal way will be viable. On the one hand, people assert that

governments

Use synonyms

should cover the cost of education and healthcare.

This

Linking Words

is because

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the

citizens

Use synonyms

have to pay a wide range of taxes in their

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

so they should be able to use these services for free like

Remove the article

apply

show examples

welfare.

Moreover

Linking Words

, healthy and educated people would provide a healthy and well-educated workforce for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society and

this

Linking Words

would be beneficial for the development of nations.

For example

Linking Words

, if people were well-educated, they would find well-paid jobs and commit fewer

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

, the

citizens

Use synonyms

would live in a peaceful and wealthy country.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the public believes that it is not the government’s

responsiblities

Correct your spelling

responsibility

to provide healthcare and education free for the

citizens

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, the public finances

Change the verb form

are

show examples

limited and it has

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

restricted payment for many areas of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society which has passed.

Therefore

Linking Words

, if

governments

Use synonyms

had to spend money on these services, it would put a dent in

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

public

fund

Fix the agreement mistake

funds

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

, the high authorities

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

other

isues

Correct your spelling

issues

which are

equal

Change the adjective

equally

show examples

vital to allocate. For

instances

Fix the agreement mistake

instance

show examples

, improving infrastructure and national security

also

Linking Words

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

so much money to conduct in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

long term. From my perspective, I strongly believe

governments

Use synonyms

should not pay the full cost and the public has to give a hand

Correct pronoun usage

to it

show examples

. Because government has

helped

Verb problem

made

show examples

these

welfares

Fix the agreement mistake

welfare

show examples

more accessible, especially for the poor and

also

Linking Words

use

Correct subject-verb agreement

uses

show examples

the rest of the budget for other fundamental fields. In conclusion, I hold a firm belief it is necessary to use the budget

Change preposition

for

show examples

these services, but the

citizens

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

take responsibility for their own

exoenses

Correct your spelling

expenses

by paying a part of the cost rather than relying entirely on the

Use synonyms

governments

Fix the agreement mistake

government

show examples

weezel

Dec 15, 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure logical sequence of ideas and paragraphs. The essay shows some attempt at structuring the argument but occasionally fails to maintain a clear progression of ideas. Consider using more clear topic sentences and cohesive devices.

coherence cohesion

Make sure that the introduction fully addresses the task and that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points. Both should be clearly identifiable and distinct.

coherence cohesion

Support main points with examples or explanations. The essay includes some general statements, but more specific examples or further elaboration could strengthen the argument.

task achievement

Fully address all parts of the task. The essay discusses both views but could be more comprehensive in its approach and provide a more thorough comparison between the two perspectives.

task achievement

Ensure that the ideas are clear and comprehensive. While the essay presents views on the topic, some may need clearer explanation or further development to effectively convey the argument to the reader.

task achievement

Include relevant and specific examples to support the claims. This essay would benefit from incorporating more concrete examples to illustrate points better and strengthen the argument.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

337 words

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Some countries achieve international sporting success by building specialised facilities to train top athletes instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some schools are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, while other schools have a very relaxed dresscode. What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?