Some people fails in school, but ends up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is important things to succeed in life?

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Recently, a number of
individuals
Use synonyms
don't succeed in schooling,
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however
Add a comma
however,
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after
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awhile,
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awhile
Correct your spelling
a while
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they become successful in their lives. I believe
this
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is
due to
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the fact that they come from rich families and one of the crucial things why they make it in
life
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is
due to
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good handling of
money
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.
Initially
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, there are so many reasons why people make it in
life
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inspite
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in spite
of failing at campus and
this
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consider
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considers
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the fact that some members are born from rich families. Some parents have a lot of
money
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to
an
Correct article usage
the
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extent that they tend to prepare for the future of their children no matter whether they are successful in education or not.
Furthermore
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, other
individuals
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just become lucky in
life
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and end up becoming successful. To clarify more, some people start a small business with little
money
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and it eventually grows up to the level of international
wothout
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without
putting in much effort until he or she
becomes
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become
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a
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apply
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billionaire.
This
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is not only
as a result
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of luck but
also
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hardwork
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hard work
.
Inspite
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In spite
of succeeding in
life
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without
Change preposition
apply
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knowing the vital things to make you successful means nothing. Proper planning and respect are the key to success whereby
individuals
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have to know how to invest their cash on top of respecting the team they are working with and to always do an audit in order to be aware if their
money
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is productive or not.
This
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will enable the people to be wealthy
as well as
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more knowledgeable about how to be important in
life
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.
For example
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, Koreans are among the wealthy
individuals
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because of
knowing
Wrong verb form
know
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how to invest their cash. In conclusion, even though a number of members turn up being
wealth
Replace the word
wealthy
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owing to the fact that they belong to rich homes and others by
luckdespite
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luck despite
not being able to attain a degree.
However
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,
i
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I
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believe they should be oriented on how to maintain the richness, it needs respecting one another and
good
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apply
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good planning
Submitted by jmeeme5 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear structure and progression. Ideas should be organized into well-defined paragraphs with clear topics and supporting details. Use a variety of linking words to help the text flow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Include an introduction that paraphrases the question and states your main points, followed by body paragraphs that explore these points with examples, and a conclusive paragraph summarizing your arguments.
Task Achievement
Focus on fully addressing the task prompt. Develop your ideas fully with explanations and examples. Your examples should be specific and relevant to the point you're making.
Task Achievement
Ensure you create a logical argument that directly relates to the task. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and be backed up with reasons and examples. Avoid introducing new ideas in the conclusion.
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