Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

It has been widely claimed that increasing the
price
of sugary products will decrease
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
consumption
among
people
.
While
it is argued by some that the method is not
crucial
Add an article
a crucial
show examples
factor
to reduce
Change preposition
in reducing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sugar
consumption
.
This
essay discusses
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the perspectives
why
Change preposition
on why
show examples
I consider that
rising
Correct your spelling
raising
show examples
the
price
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
goods is not
particularly
Correct article usage
a particularly
show examples
effective method for persuading
people
to reduce
the
Change the word
their
show examples
sugar
consumption
habitat for
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
heathier. To
being
Verb problem
begin
show examples
with, it might seem reasonable for some to believe that the
price
of goods is one of
Correct article usage
the important
show examples
important
Correct article usage
the important
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
factors
show examples
factor
Fix the agreement mistake
factors
show examples
that makes the effect to
decision
Add an article
the decision
a decision
show examples
of customers.
However
, it could be less important
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a hard
day
.
For example
,
people
might consider a reward for themselves after going through
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
hard
day
or difficult situation as
such
favourite dessert and drinking.
For
Change preposition
From
show examples
this
perspective, it could make the
food
more
affective
Correct your spelling
effective
show examples
to buy even
the
Correct word choice
if the
show examples
price
of the
food
is higher than other types of
food
.
Moreover
, it could
a
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
significant point to debate that
interest
Correct article usage
the interest
show examples
of
customer
Fix the agreement mistake
customers
show examples
to make a decision on consuming
food
is not always attracted by the
price
. To clarify the argument, it could be seen that some
people
in society nowadays are surrounded by hectic
circumstance
Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
show examples
.
For instance
, fast foods or processed
food
are more reachable during the working
day
.
As a consequence
,
this
could cause
people
Fix the infinitive
to loss
show examples
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
focus on the reason to consume the
food
for their health but choose to buy
food
that is
easily available. In conclusion,
although
it is undeniable that the
price
of sugar should be rising to reduce the
consumption
for better health of
population
Add an article
the population
a population
show examples
, I am the option believing that the
price
of the product could not affect the consuming habitat because
people
still seem to prefer to buy the sweet
food
on
tough
Change the article
a tough
show examples
day
as a reward and on
busy
Change the article
a busy
show examples
day
because of the convenience.
Submitted by kanittha.sma on

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  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

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  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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