Some people think it is one of the best ways to solve environmental problems by increasing the cost of fuels for cars and other vehicles. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays,
air
pollution is one of the major problems in the world.Some people believe that raising the price of gas for automobiles can solve
this
problem.I totally disagree with
this
view,since expensive types of gasoline can affect individuals who rely on autos for work and other stuff.Needless to say, there are other ways to resolve these ecological concerns.
To begin
with,people with low incomes can be unfairly impacted by the expensive worth of autos. Individuals use cars in their daily lives for many reasons.Cars are used to get to work,to travel and so on.It means that they spend plenty of gasoline.In
this
case,the raised price of fuel can take a bunch of money from them.
For instance
,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a person who earns 30 pounds per month,
It
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is prohibited
to spend
Change preposition
from spending
show examples
cash on fuel.Because they must save some money for food,clothes and other essentials.
Finally
,it is the wrong way to resolve the
air
quality concern.
Secondly
,we have various ways to deal with
this
trouble. There are many factors that badly affect
air
quality.
For example
,burning of garbage waste and cutting down the trees.As I see it,
ministry
Add an article
the ministry
show examples
should take action on these things rather than increasing the price of fuels.Not only the law,but every human being can take action.
For instance
,if we do not burn the rubbish and plant some plants or even trees, it is our best to a better
air
quality.
To sum up
,
instead
of raising the payment for petrol,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
politics should focus on more important factors.
Then
, our nature will be clear and safe.
Submitted by medet.khan774 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction & Conclusion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion that articulate your position. Ensure that your essay has a clearly defined structure with an unambiguous introduction and a conclusion that summarizes your viewpoint. Refrain from introducing new points in the conclusion.
Cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your essay. Your argument would benefit from a logical progression of ideas with clear paragraphing and varied conjunctions and discourse markers.
Tone
Avoid contractions and informal language in academic writing. Always use the full forms (e.g., 'do not' instead of 'don't') and maintain a formal tone throughout the essay.
Supporting Details
Provide more detailed examples and explanations to support each point. Instead of making general statements, use specific, relevant examples to demonstrate how your ideas apply to the question being asked.
Task Response
Address the task directly by discussing both sides of the argument before providing your own opinion. Make sure your viewpoint is clear and that you fully explore the implications of your stance in relation to the question.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Environmental preservation
  • Sustainable transportation
  • Green technologies
  • Alternative energy sources
  • Renewable energy
  • Fuel-efficient vehicles
  • Electric vehicles (EVs)
  • Public transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic impact
  • Consumer behavior
  • Disproportionate effect
  • Government subsidies
  • Comprehensive policies
  • Cost-effective solutions
  • Carbon footprint reduction
What to do next:
Look at other essays: