Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

There is no doubt that these days

people

Use synonyms

have problems with their

health

Use synonyms

which is making their

health

Use synonyms

worse some

people

Use synonyms

believe that an increase in public

health

Use synonyms

facilities is significant

while

Linking Words

others think that an increase the public

health

Use synonyms

will be affected. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I am going to discuss both views and draw my opinion. In terms of benefits expansion of public

health

Use synonyms

in the whole world is again thought as we have a lake of public

health

Use synonyms

in our country making

sports

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popular in our country

moreover

Linking Words

, to encourage

people

Use synonyms

to do exercise in convenient time and

also

Linking Words

anytime.in terms of disadvantages,

people

Use synonyms

argue that public

health

Use synonyms

is not essential nowadays there are gyms, clubs, and

people

Use synonyms

can do

sports

Use synonyms

in their homes some

people

Use synonyms

think that increasing our a building and a road is necessary nowadays more than that. The main reason for giving support to

this

Linking Words

is that public

health

Use synonyms

plays in many ways to decrease your weight, to be mental

health

Use synonyms

and you get a good mood. To illustrate, there was a questionnaire for raising

sports

Use synonyms

facilities well many

people

Use synonyms

want to do

sports

Use synonyms

and be healthy.

In other words

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is an argument about

sports

Use synonyms

, that will affect

people

Use synonyms

not just the government. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

both views are essential for

this

Linking Words

the contemporary era

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

in my opinion as I can see from the world where many

people

Use synonyms

fat

Add a missing verb

are fat

show examples

therefore

Linking Words

, developing public

sports

Use synonyms

is perfect for

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

nowadays.

luhana.chii

Dec 17, 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure your essay has a clear logical structure with distinct introduction, body, and conclusion sections. Your essay attempts to address these but the transition between ideas is at times unclear.

coherence cohesion

Aim to avoid repeating arguments. Focus on providing clear and distinct points in each paragraph, rather than reiterating the same idea in different words.

coherence cohesion

Use paragraphs to separate different ideas and arguments clearly. Each paragraph should address a single main idea and provide supporting sentences that reinforce that idea.

task achievement

Make sure you provide a complete response to the task with a clear opinion or solution. Your essay touches on the points but does not develop each one sufficiently.

task achievement

Develop clear and comprehensive ideas that relate directly to the question. Work on explaining how these ideas answer the prompt fully. Ideas in your essay were at times unclear or underdeveloped.

task achievement

Include relevant and specific examples to support your main points. This will make your essay more persuasive and your arguments more compelling. Your essay lacked specific examples to support its claims.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

246 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

public health
sports facilities
physical activity
exercise
chronic diseases
heart disease
obesity
inclusivity
participation
safe environment
social interaction
community engagement
comprehensive approach
health education programs
environmental factors
healthcare infrastructure
quality healthcare services
public health initiatives

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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.

Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life. Which do you consider to be the major influence?

The use of mobile phones in certain places is as antisocial as smoking. Do you think the use of mobile phones should be banned like smoking?

Many students find it is harder to study at university or college compared to when they were in grade school. Why is this? What are some possible solutions for this problem?

Some people say that museums should be free, whereas others find that some entry fee should be there. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

You have organized 90th birthday of your relative and invited elderly guests also. It was a successful party. Write a letter to the hotel manager to provide the feedback. In your letter you should tell When the party was Why it was successful Thank for a staff member who was really helpful