IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart shows the percentage of the total world population in 4 countries in 1950 and 2002, and projections for 2050.

The bar chart shows the percentage of the total world population in 4 countries in 1950 and 2002, and projections for 2050.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given diagram illustrates the percentage of the total world
population
Use synonyms
 in
India
Use synonyms
,
China
Use synonyms
,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and
Japan
Use synonyms
 from 1950 to 2002 and
predicted
Correct article usage
the predicted
show examples
 amount for 2050.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the most
distribution
Replace the word
distributed
show examples
 country
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 is
China
Use synonyms
, followed by
India
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and
Japan
Use synonyms
 had the
lessest
Correct your spelling
least
 contribution among
four
Correct article usage
the four
show examples
 countries. In
comparsion
Correct your spelling
comparison
,
China
Use synonyms
 and
Japan
Use synonyms
 show a
down trend
Correct your spelling
downtrend
show examples
while
Linking Words
India
Use synonyms
 experiences an upward trend.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
China
Use synonyms
 had the highest
population
Use synonyms
started
Wrong verb form
starting
show examples
from1950
Correct your spelling
from 1950
 at around 23%,
however
Linking Words
, it slightly decreased to 20% and
estimated
Add a missing verb
is estimated
show examples
fall
Fix the infinitive
to fall
show examples
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 15% in 2050.
Similary
Correct your spelling
Similarly
,
Japan
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 showed a downward tendency from 4% in 1950 and predicted
dropped
Wrong verb form
a drop
show examples
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 1%
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
India
Use synonyms
's
population
Use synonyms
 has
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 up
going
Verb problem
apply
show examples
trend with 15% in the beginning and
forecated
Wrong verb form
the forecast
show examples
 increased by 4% to
near
Change the word
nearly
show examples
 20%.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 of
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 was around 6% at
Correct article usage
the started
show examples
started
Change the form of the verb
start
show examples
 but declined to 5% in 2002 and remained unchanged
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the prediction
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 2050.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words population, india, china, japan with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • bar chart
  • percentage
  • total world population
  • countries
  • 1950
  • 2003
  • projections
  • 2050
  • comparison
  • trend
  • increase
  • decrease
  • stable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: