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Band 7

Computers can now help people translate things immediately so there is no need for people to learn other languages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#computers #people #languages
Over the past few decades, modern technology has been used in nearly all areas of our lives, and translation is no exception.
Due to
 that, it is highly argued by some groups of individuals that people are no longer required to learn a foreign
language
 which sounds not justified to me. To commence with, enormous importance has been laid on pursuing another
language
. First and foremost, not only does it provide tremendous opportunities for building a network but
also
 it boosts mental activity and mental health. A vast majority of articles demonstrate that bilingual elderly are at a lower risk of detrimental mental diseases.
Secondly
, computers are not available 24/7 to usher us,
moreover
, the translation process takes a staggering amount of time which could be boring especially if we are talking lively,
hence
 these devices are not quite reliable.
Last
 but not least, in many cases becoming familiar with the local
language
 in order to start an occupation or pursue academic education would be significantly essential.
This
 happens when an adolescent decides to immigrate from a European country to the UK to study master's,
thus
 learning English would be inevitable for taking part in class discussions, completing a master’s dissertation, and so on.
Nonetheless
, the utilization of technology-based devices might be insufficient. All summed up the necessities
along with
 the attitudes and aptitudes connected to the topics clarified above, illustrate, that people may vary in their point of view,
however
, despite the existence of computers learning a foreign
language
 has many plus points on a greater scope. There is now on a more personal level,
this
 scenario sounds right to me.
Submitted by maryam.niknamm on

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Task Achievement
In terms of task response, while the essay addresses the prompt, it lacks a fully developed argument. The introduction provides a clear thesis, but there isn't a sufficient range of ideas that are fully extended or supported with specific and relevant examples. Aim to provide a more detailed analysis with clear arguments supported by appropriately explained examples or data to enhance task achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your coherence and cohesion need attention. The essay has a recognisable logical structure, but the transitions between ideas could be smoother. Utilize a variety of linking words and phrases to establish clear relationships between sentences and paragraphs. Also, make sure that each paragraph centers on one main idea, providing clear topic sentences and subsequent supporting sentences that expand on that point.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • real-time translation
  • cultural nuances
  • context-specific meanings
  • cognitive skills
  • personal and professional advancement
  • idiomatic expressions
  • slang
  • dialects
  • human intervention
  • emotional bonding
  • social integration
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