Being a celebrity, such as a famous film star or sports personality, brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?

The debate over whether the life of a

celebrity

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is one of enviable

advantage

Fix the agreement mistake

advantages

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or burdensome

difficulty

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difficulties

show examples

is ongoing. In my view, the scale tips towards the latter; being a

celebrity

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often brings more problems than it does benefits. On the surface,

celebrities

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enjoy myriad privileges. Fame often equates to wealth, access to exclusive events, and the ability to influence. Film stars and sports icons are revered, their endorsements sought after, and their lifestyles glamorized. The allure of

this

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celebrity

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status is undeniable; it can elevate

individuals

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to positions where they can effect positive change. Charitable causes,

for instance

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, benefit immensely when a

celebrity

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advocates for them, leading to increased awareness and funding.

However

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, these benefits come at a steep price. The loss of privacy is one of the most significant issues faced by

celebrities

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. They are under constant scrutiny, with their personal lives displayed for public consumption.

This

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invasion of privacy can be distressing and often leads to psychological stress. The expectation to maintain a certain public image can be suffocating, and any deviation from

this

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image is met with harsh criticism or even scandal.

Furthermore

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, the impact of

celebrity

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culture on society raises concerns. Young

individuals

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in particular

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, are susceptible to the influence of

celebrities

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, who are not always paragons of virtue. Negative

behaviors

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behaviours

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exhibited by famous

individuals

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can be quickly mimicked by impressionable fans, propagating unhealthy lifestyles or attitudes. The recent phenomenon of social media influencers, who may attain

celebrity

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status through digital platforms, exacerbates

this

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, as their lives are even more accessible and influential on the youth. There is

also

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the issue of disparity.

Celebrities

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often earn exorbitant amounts for their work, which can seem disproportionate compared to professions that are arguably more essential,

such

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as teaching or healthcare.

This

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can distort public perception of the value of different vocations and contribute to a societal imbalance where entertainment is prized over fundamental services. In conclusion,

while

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the glittering benefits of fame are highly visible, the personal and societal problems it brings are significant and multifaceted. The challenges of living life in the spotlight often overshadow the perks that come with it, leading me to believe that being a

celebrity

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is more problematic than beneficial. It is essential to look beyond the glamour and recognize the profound consequences that fame can have on

individuals

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and society at large.

careyche

Dec 18, 2023

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introduction conclusion present

Ensure the introduction and conclusion are directly addressing the question posed. While both were present and provided a clear thesis, make sure the conclusion succinctly restates your position and summarizes the key arguments without introducing new information.

logical structure

Develop paragraphs with clear topic sentences and subsequent supporting sentences that are fully elaborated on. Logical connectors should be used throughout to enhance coherence.

supported main points

Include more specific examples to support each main point, ensuring that these examples are relevant and detailed to illustrate your arguments effectively.

complete response

Address all parts of the task thoroughly, including both sides of the argument, even if you are asked to argue in one direction. Make sure your position is clear throughout the response.

clear comprehensive ideas

Clarify and elaborate on your ideas to ensure they are comprehensive, and there is a depth to your argumentation. Avoid making generalized statements without sufficient explanation.

relevant specific examples

Incorporate a variety of detailed examples that are directly relevant to your arguments to substantiate the points being made, enhancing the effectiveness of your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

391 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Public scrutiny
Intrusive
Endorsements
Sponsorships
Financial security
High-profile collaborations
Social influence
Philanthropic efforts
Trust issues
Mental health challenges
Substance abuse
Pressures of celebrity
Expectations
Disconnect from reality
Normalcy

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Some people say that too much attention and too many resources are given to protect wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agee or disagree?