In some cities, public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In the modern age, some parks and outdoor spaces for the community are being repurposed for gardens to grow natural foods.
This
author believes that the drawbacks of environmental problems and hard management outweigh the benefits of a physically strong lifestyle.
One of the disadvantageous impacts of public gardens is pollution. It must be acknowledged that gardening activities require loads of techniques and materials Linking Words
such
as fertilizers or toxicants. Indeed, because of affordable cost and high efficiency, many people use chemical fertilizers and pesticides for their trees. Linking Words
As a consequence
, these chemicals are the main reason leading to environmental contamination, especially soil deterioration. Linking Words
Moreover
, by using chemicals in growing activities, the products from these trees contain a significant amount of poison which can have seriously negative effects on consumers. Linking Words
For instance
, nearly half of cancer patients in Vietnam come from eating foods containing pesticides.
Another point to consider is that there are the majority of difficulties in garden management. To be more particular, these gardens are opened for publicity, so it is really hard for owners to manage and it can lead to many social issues like fruit thieves or litter from unexpected visitors. Linking Words
As a result
, these problems are the reason for annoying, difficulties in management and can bring considerable inconvenience for owners in the long term. Take some countries in Asia as an example here, where residents prioritize cleanliness on top and local governments establish strict policies to punish unaware people in public sites.
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However
, the public garden has the potential positive on individuals’ lifestyles. It must be recognized that organic foods play a vital role in life. By having more land, residents are encouraged to consume healthy fruits and vegetables which fosters a healthy and balanced diet. Linking Words
Thus
, the convenience of owning a collective land cannot be deniable.
Taking all points into account, the advantage of physically strong nourishment is outweighed by the disadvantages of pollution and the inconvenience of managing. Linking Words
Therefore
, local authorities should promulgate suitable policies to resolve these problems.Linking Words
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task achievement
While you have addressed both advantages and disadvantages, ensure that you offer a more balanced view by discussing both sides in equal measure. This will help in presenting a more comprehensive argument.
task achievement
Work on making your main points and supporting details more clear and comprehensive. Adding more specific examples will strengthen your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
The essay's logical flow can be improved by ensuring that each paragraph logically leads to the next. You could also make your topic sentences clearer to better introduce each paragraph's main idea.
coherence and cohesion
Although you have structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, work on refining the logical structure within each paragraph for better readability.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction and a clear conclusion which effectively summarize the essay.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the case of cancer patients in Vietnam.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.