Some people think that foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors during their visit to historic and cultural places. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #visitors #visit #places

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Some individuals

believed

Wrong verb form

believe

show examples

that foreign

visitors

Use synonyms

should pay more

money

Use synonyms

than local people during their visit to historic and cultural

places

Use synonyms

. I totally disagree with

this

Linking Words

stament

Correct your spelling

statement

because

foreing

Correct your spelling

foreign

visitors

Use synonyms

might decide not

coming

Change the verb form

to come

show examples

to see cultural

places

Use synonyms

anymore and historical

places

Use synonyms

might have to

closed

Change the verb

show examples

due to

Linking Words

not having enough

money

Use synonyms

to maintain them. One of the

reason

Change to a plural noun

reasons

show examples

I did not support

this

Linking Words

statements

Fix the agreement mistake

statement

show examples

is that

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

idea

Use synonyms

Change preposition

that

show examples

foreign

visitors

Use synonyms

should pay more

money

Use synonyms

to visit cultural

places

Use synonyms

is totally wrong because

this

Linking Words

lead to

bad

Correct article usage

a bad

show examples

image for our country.

Also

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

feel

Change the verb form

feeling

show examples

unwelcome to foreign

visitors

Use synonyms

to our country because they need to pay extra

money

Use synonyms

to enjoy historic

places

Use synonyms

. On top of

this

Linking Words

, feeling that they are not treated

equal

Change the adjective

equally

show examples

as the rest of the society might

ofend

Correct your spelling

offend

find

them.

For instance

Linking Words

, in most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

countries

Add a comma

countries,

show examples

tourists are welcome and public spaces offer them the best service and prices to make sure they will return the following year. Another reason why I do not support

this

Linking Words

statement is that cultural

places

Use synonyms

Add the comma(s)

, as well as historic buildings,

show examples

as well as

Linking Words

historic buildings might have to close because of not having

enought

Correct your spelling

enough

money

Use synonyms

to maintain them in

well

Correct word choice

good

show examples

Fix the agreement mistake

condition

show examples

conditions

Fix the agreement mistake

condition

show examples

due to

Linking Words

the fewer

visitors

Use synonyms

every year.

This

Linking Words

might be because foreign tourists might decide not

coming

Change the verb form

to come

show examples

back

due to

Linking Words

the necessity of making

Change the article

show examples

extra payment. On top of

this

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is an illogical way of treating

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

show examples

and they might decide to spread the

idea

Use synonyms

of not visiting any more our country. To

illustratre

Correct your spelling

illustrate

my point, many developed countries have

suffer

Change the verb form

suffered

show examples

from losing tourists

due to

Linking Words

high

Correct article usage

the high

show examples

cost of living

such

Linking Words

renting

Change preposition

as renting

show examples

a hotel or buying food so they abandon the

idea

Use synonyms

comign

Correct your spelling

coming

back, and

this

Linking Words

lead

Replace the word

led

show examples

to many people

loosing

Replace the word

losing

show examples

their jobs. In conclusion, foreign

visitors

Use synonyms

should not be asked to pay more

for visiting

Change preposition

to visit

show examples

historic and cultural

places

Use synonyms

because they might

decided

Change the verb form

decide

be decided

show examples

not

coming

Change the verb form

to come

show examples

back to visit these

places

Use synonyms

and they might feel offended, so I strongly support the

idea

Use synonyms

of not asking them for extra

money

Use synonyms

and they should be treated the same way as the local people.

Submitted by cuevas14dic on Tue Dec 19 2023

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coherence cohesion

Your essay lacks a clear logical structure, which makes it difficult to follow your arguments at times. Try using clear paragraphing and ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea, providing clear topic sentences at the beginning of each. Moreover, use a variety of linking devices to create cohesion between your ideas within and across paragraphs.

task achievement

You have addressed the topic, but your response is not fully developed. Be sure to fully answer all parts of the prompt, providing a more detailed explanation of your position and discussing the implications of the issue. It is important to expand on your ideas with clear and detailed examples or reasons to support your arguments, which will help achieve a complete response and clearer, more comprehensive ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

351 words

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Some people think that foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors during their visit to historic and cultural places. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcylces are banned from city center. People are encouraged to use public transports such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free day. To what extent do you think the advantages of this outweighs the disadvantages?

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and cociety. To what extent do you agree?

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and giver your own opinion.

As air travel has become cheaper, more and more people are travelling abroad for their vacations instead of visiting places in their own country. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Schools should stop using books for teaching to learn as they find them boring, and use films, TV and computers instead. To what extent do you agree with this?