Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?.
In recent year, it
is
known that developed Wrong verb form
has been
countries
Use synonyms
has
helped Change the verb form
have
the
undeveloped Correct article usage
apply
countries
by giving them Use synonyms
a
financial Remove the article
apply
aid
. It is often argued that it will be better for them to give another Use synonyms
solution
as money does not solve the problem. Personally, I completely agree that there are Use synonyms
another method
to solve Fix the agreement mistake
other methods
the
Correct article usage
apply
poverty
in undeveloped Use synonyms
countries
.
First of all, I believe that money can solve everything, only if it is handed to the right person. Use synonyms
Moreover
, with the financial Linking Words
aid
given by rich Use synonyms
countries
, undeveloped Use synonyms
contries
could use it to help their poor citizen financially. Correct your spelling
countries
For example
, healthy food, education, or even Linking Words
houses
are the common Wrong verb form
housing
method
they use. Unfortunately, when it comes to Fix the agreement mistake
methods
a
systematic Remove the article
apply
poverty
, Use synonyms
this
kind of help is only a short-term Linking Words
solution
because Use synonyms
they
Correct your spelling
the
aid
will be gone in a few months or even weeks. Use synonyms
Hence
, it will be better if the Linking Words
solution
can Use synonyms
give
a long-term impact.
Verb problem
have
On the other hand
, there are several other Linking Words
method
to help undeveloped Change to a plural noun
methods
countries
Use synonyms
solving
their Wrong verb form
solve
poverty
Use synonyms
problems
. Use synonyms
Firstly
, building an irrigation system in a dry area might help the Linking Words
countries
to solve their water and food Use synonyms
problems
. Use synonyms
Moreover
, Linking Words
this
Linking Words
solution
may Use synonyms
also
improve the Linking Words
citizen
health as health Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
problems
Use synonyms
usually
related to water and nutrient Add a missing verb
are usually
source
. Fix the agreement mistake
sources
Secondly
, cooperating with the local government to solve local Linking Words
problems
Use synonyms
such
as in education, human resources development, or even in Linking Words
the
transportation. Correct article usage
apply
Thus
, the Linking Words
aid
can be more powerful to give a long-term Use synonyms
solution
.
In conclusion, giving help will alwaysUse synonyms
a
good thing to do, but it will be better to give Add a missing verb
be a
an
effective help. In Remove the article
apply
this
matter, financial Linking Words
aid
is only a Use synonyms
short term
help for Add a hyphen
short-term
a
poor Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
countries
, Use synonyms
while
giving an actual act and cooperation Linking Words
developed
Change preposition
to developed
countries
can solve the Use synonyms
poverty
in undeveloped one.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
While your essay does include a logical structure, there is room for improvement. Consider focusing on clarity in the progression of your ideas. Ensure the ideas flow naturally from one paragraph to the next, using a variety of linking words and phrases effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be strengthened. Aim to provide a clearer thesis statement and overview of the main points in your introduction, and ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay's arguments without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are supported, but sometimes the support is not fully developed. Aim to expand on your examples and explanations, providing a deeper analysis that directly ties back to your main argument.
task achievement
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task achievement
You've communicated clear ideas, but strive for a greater depth of idea development. Consider exploring the implications or consequences of the issues you raise in greater detail.
task achievement
Your use of relevant examples is adequate, but could be more specific and detailed. Incorporate concrete examples that directly illustrate the points you are making, which can enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.