some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsabilities.

#people #years #times #lives #adult #life #happiness #spite #responsabilities

Most

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apply

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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people believe that the teenage

Verb problem

years are

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the best

time

of their

life

while

others think adult is

the

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show examples

joyful

time

instead

lot

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a lot

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of responsibilities. I will explain both views

further

Firstly

, During

teenage

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the teenage

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, Children enjoy their

life

to the fullest because as they don’t have any responsibility

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for

show examples

job

Add an article

the job

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, household work etc. they spend their quality

time

with friends, games or in school as parents never want their kids to indulge in any tension .

For instance

During

covid

Correct your spelling

COVID-19

some people

losses

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lost

show examples

their

job

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jobs

show examples

and they got a loss in their

business

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businesses

show examples

but none of the parents stopped

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

schooling or any other basic

need

Fix the agreement mistake

needs

show examples

of their kids even though they were suffering from financial crunches.

Although

guardians brought

phone

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phones

show examples

for them to attend online classes. On

other

Correct article usage

the other

show examples

hand, as believed by some

persons

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people

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adult age is the best

time

to cherish your

life

moments in spite of several responsibilities because

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show examples

this

age you are financially independent and

have

Add a missing verb

do have

show examples

not to seek any permission from your adults.

For example

, if you want to go out for a movie

along with

friends

easily

Rephrase

apply

show examples

you can go out. In

this

Add a comma

this,

show examples

you realize the value of

parents

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parents'

parent's

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care and their ethics

how

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in how

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they raised you as now you are in their

shoe

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shoes

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. I firmly believe that, whether it is

adult

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adults

show examples

teenage

Correct your spelling

teenagers

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both

age

Fix the agreement mistake

ages

show examples

are having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

their own experience and learning we should enjoy

the

Remove the article

apply

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each moment of our

life

, “AGE IS JUST NUMBERS”

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well said by

French

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a French

show examples

author.

Submitted by preetiaug25 on Tue Dec 19 2023

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task achievement

While you presented a clear position throughout the response, the main points in the essay could be more fully developed and extended. Try to provide more detailed explanations and expand on your ideas to create a deeper, more nuanced argument.

coherence cohesion

The organization of your essay needs improvement for better logical progression and coherence. Use a range of cohesive devices to link your ideas more effectively, and ensure that each paragraph has a clear central theme that is fully elaborated upon.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people's lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsabilities.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is betger to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features of the graph and make comparisons

In the future all cars, busses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Food travels thousands of miles from farmers to consumers. Some people think that it would be better for our environment and economy if people consumed locally produced foods. To what extent do the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?