Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is frequently claimed that athletes and entertaining stars are overpaid compared to those working in other professional areas.
However
, my stance differs from this
viewpoint, for other careers have been deliberately overlooked and economically undervalued.
Some may insist that the high salary of sports and arts professionals is justified since it reflects the public popularity. In other words
, audiences are willing to pay for what they enjoy watching in sports events and on televisions
, and Fix the agreement mistake
television
such
choices are deemed sensible. In fact, however
, we should bear in mind that viewers are actually made to pay for what they are selectively shown and overly exposed to under the influence from
commercial organizations and the media. TV and streaming media are flooded with shows and advertisements which are funded by companies, grasping most of the public attention and in turn diminishing the social spotlight on the other significant occupations. Change preposition
of
Hence
, it is difficult to ascertain that members in highly-focused
fields have earned their fortune Correct your spelling
highly focused
due to
mass preference.
We need to be aware that other jobs which shoulder huge responsibilities and make substantial contributions have long been devalued financially. Leading politicians make crucial policies to maintain social stability, top surgeons heal the wounded and rescue the dying, researchers and scientists push ahead innovative strides of our nations, and dedicated educators cultivate the next generation and prepare them as qualified social members. Those careers serve as more profound drivers for the advancement of our country and Correct article usage
the well-beings
well-beings
of the public, and Correct your spelling
well-being
thus
deserve a higher payment.
In conclusion, I completely believe that significant professions which are vital to social progress ought to earn more than those in sports and entertainment areas.Submitted by zhaoruolin220 on
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coherence cohesion
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The use of relevant examples in your essay was somewhat limited. Including more specific illustrations will provide stronger support for your arguments and a clearer demonstration of your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas
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- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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- Sentence 1 - Summary
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- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
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