In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, money has become an aspect of a
country to
Change preposition
country's
develop
. With Replace the word
development
high
amount of pay, some societies argue that it would be beneficial for a nation. Add an article
the high
a high
Conversely
, others ensure that the government should manage the level of the Linking Words
salary
. The decision-maker should take Use synonyms
an
action on Correct article usage
apply
this
occasion to mitigate the unbalanced salaries of their citizens. In my perspective, there has to be a policy to control the companies for paying their employees.
On the one hand, Linking Words
high
Add an article
a high
salary
is Use synonyms
the
evidence Correct article usage
apply
of
a company Change preposition
that
that they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
reward
Correct subject-verb agreement
rewards
their
employees properly. Correct pronoun usage
its
They
who have high salaries tend to be Correct pronoun usage
Those
valuable
than Correct quantifier usage
more valuable
the
other employers. Take an example in a company, the manager position should Correct article usage
apply
has
Change the verb form
have
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
salary
because the liability of he or she is much harder than the ordinary staff. Use synonyms
Therefore
, Linking Words
valuable
person is paid based on their value.
Add an article
a valuable
the valuable
On the other hand
, it brings Linking Words
the
unbalanced lifestyle to Correct article usage
an
the
others since many of them cannot have Correct article usage
apply
an
adequate in certain Correct article usage
apply
both
activities and experiences. Correct pronoun usage
apply
For instance
, because of her Linking Words
Correct your spelling
low salary
low-
Correct your spelling
low salary
salary
, a Use synonyms
Fix the agreement mistake
woman
women
cannot afford an automatic cleaner. The commission Fix the agreement mistake
woman
have
a responsibility to manage Change the verb form
has
their
citizens by helping them Correct pronoun usage
its
Linking Words
such
an annual fund for Change preposition
with such
them
who have Correct pronoun usage
those
unadequate
salaries. By directly helping their citizens; Correct your spelling
inadequate
thus
, it will be much Linking Words
fruitful
for them.
In my opinion, I prefer that the commission and companies Correct quantifier usage
more fruitful
must
collaborate to reconfigure their terms in Verb problem
apply
salary
because the company is the Use synonyms
first-role
sides of an employee to earn money and the Correct your spelling
first
commision
is the Correct your spelling
commission
another
side to control Correct quantifier usage
other
this
phenomenon.
In conclusion, Linking Words
wealthiness
can be an important key Replace the word
wealth
of
a Change preposition
to
nation to be
Change the verb form
nation's
developed
. Replace the word
development
Knowledgeable
person could have several chances to help their countries to become Add an article
A knowledgeable
The knowledgeable
a
developed Correct article usage
apply
country
. I believe that there must be a collaboration between some companies and the government to contribute Fix the agreement mistake
countries
for
the developed country.Change preposition
to
Submitted by re.li on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Coherence & Cohesion
For a higher score in coherence and cohesion, ensure that paragraphs are logically connected with clear transitions, and that ideas flow naturally from one to the next. Review the use of cohesive devices and paragraphing to structure your essay more effectively.
Task Achievement
Your essay provides a reasonable attempt at addressing the task with some evidence of a response to the prompt. However, it is essential to develop your points more fully to meet the upper bands. You should include more detailed examples and explanations to fully address all parts of the task.
Task Achievement
To enhance your score, your essay should consistently provide relevant examples to support your main points. The examples should be specific and directly linked to the points being made, which greatly strengthens the argument or discussion within your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.