Developing countries require help offered by international organizations to ensure development. Some people think that financial aid is important. Others believe that sending talents and giving advice to help them are more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#countries #organizations #development #people #aid #talents #advice

A debate over which help of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

international organization is necessary for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poor

countries

, donating lots of

money

, dispatching professional staff , and donating some practical ideas has gained attention.

While

some claim

money

is more important ,other states that useful suggestions are more valuable than everything. I will support both because all are essential equally. On the one hand, some supporters believe that

money

is crucial and a plethora of amounts should be donated to the not wealthy

countries

. First of all ,cash can have a better life instantly which has no doubt. It is known ,that finance is the pillar of a developed nation as it allows the locals to build fundamental infrastructures

such

as hospitals, food, shelter, and education.

For instance

, if someone has

money

and power

then

she or he can choose to be admitted to a good hospital and at the same time can admit their child to a qualitiful school.

In addition

, currency can subsidise disabled people who live in the lowest-income standard.

As a consequence

, the pound gives direct aid to developing

countries

On the other hand

, individuals contend teaching local people with the assistance of talented staff who are from the developed world is necessary.

Besides

, it helps to increase their earning source naturally.

For example

, when

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

agricultural professors teach

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

farmers how to grow plants well and the way to maintain their domestic

animal

Fix the agreement mistake

animals

show examples

,the farmers will find it possible and easier than before.

Therefore

, technology provides

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the setting of

the

Correct article usage

show examples

healthy economy which

money

can not do.

conversely

, the function of

money

is short term

whereas

the function of technology is long-term. In conclusion, in my opinion,

money

and talent both are significant for living and earning in undeveloped

countries

, it is not only ensure a better life but

also

personal welfare.

Submitted by hashi4728 on Tue Dec 19 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic, but your arguments need to be more clearly developed. Ensure your introduction clearly states the essay's purpose and your conclusion summarizes your main points effectively.

coherence cohesion

Use a variety of linking words to improve the flow of your essay and make sure paragraphs are well-developed with clear main ideas. Check for grammatical consistency and the correct use of tenses throughout.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

302 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
level of youth crime is increasing day by day aroun the world. Give some reasons and some sollutions to stop it.
In the recent years, crime committed by adolescents, has been increasing worldwide. This essay will cover on causes and solutions of the problem.
4.5
band
nowadays many people are working remotely if they have chance do advantages can outweigh disadvantages?
In many developed cities, people prefer working online, with having such trend means that employees can work from their own home. Both positive and negative sides of working online can be found, but overall, I believe that adventages of this trend can outweigh disadventages.
4
band
Due to so many young people dropping out of schools, the rate of unemploymentis increasing, and it affects our society in different ways. In your opinion, how can this situation be improved?
Many young students drop out of schools, sometimes to earn to support their families and sometimes due to other reasons, and this has a severe consequence to their future and society. Sometimes those students are to be blamed, but oftentimes, the system is responsible for it. The state should revise the way it runs schools and arranges re-schooling facilities while the school authority should provide some paid jobs to needy students to mend this situation.
4.5
band
Today people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent times, the media and its offshoots are playing a vital role in everyone’s life. Because of which, there is a widespread criticism that states the role of advertisements being telecasted in television or shared in any of the social media seems to be demoralising and carry little benefits. While I concede to this belief about the maligning impacts of commercials, I have some reservations in completely banning those.
5.5
band
Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
People hold conflicting views whether continue to learn after high school or go to work instantly. While some argue that go straightforward for a job may bring about some certain benefits, I believe that keeping on studying is a better solution.

Developing countries require help offered by international organizations to ensure development. Some people think that financial aid is important. Others believe that sending talents and giving advice to help them are more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

level of youth crime is increasing day by day aroun the world. Give some reasons and some sollutions to stop it.

nowadays many people are working remotely if they have chance do advantages can outweigh disadvantages?

Due to so many young people dropping out of schools, the rate of unemploymentis increasing, and it affects our society in different ways. In your opinion, how can this situation be improved?

Today people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.