Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

In the modern era, individuals prefer to be self-employed rather than working under the employers in different organisations. Well, there are various extrapolates behind
this
trend
along with
various disastrous effects on society. I will explicate these in the upcoming paragraphs
along with
the relevant examples and
thus
will lead to a logical conclusion as well. To commence with reasons, why do humans prefer working for themself? The prominent reason behind
this
is that men and women do not have enough education
as well as
experience level to meet the requirements of the
company
to acquire a job position. A piece of evidence related to
this
scenario is, as I saw in the newspaper
last
month, Tata
company
was hiring people but only those who already have 10 years of working experience from any multinational
company
along with
a degree of law from the best law schools in Canada or Australia.
Hence
,
due to
such
cases, people are left with no options to open their own
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
.
Besides
, some employers do not show a good demeanour towards their employees, as they treat them not like their workers but as they are slaves.
As a consequence
, the bulk of individuals start their freelance work to fulfil their basic necessities. Needless to say, these pros stand in very good stead. On the flip side, being self-employed does not provide guaranteed bi-weekly or monthly salaries because in
this
case
,
single
Add an article
a single
show examples
person is going to be liable for all the losses and profits.
Whereas
Correct word choice
However
show examples
,
this
is not the
case
if you work in any
company
, either the firm
incur
Correct subject-verb agreement
incurs
show examples
gain or loss,
workers
Correct word choice
and workers
show examples
will get their pay on time.
Furthermore
, in independent entrepreneurship, only one person is bearing the all stress regarding working hours, sales and management as well.
This
case
might cause physical or psychological disorders to the owner
therefore
, the business needs to be shut down in
such
case
.
Hence
, it is apparent to say, why many people are against
this
trend.
To conclude
,
according to
the reasons aforementioned above one can reach a logical result that the drawbacks of working independently are instrumental indeed.
Nevertheless
, its potential benefits should not be overlooked either.
Submitted by ss6802125 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay needs a clearer and more logical structure. The ideas presented are not always well-organized and can be difficult to follow. Consider planning your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs each discussing one main idea, and a conclusion that summarizes the points made.
coherence cohesion
There is an attempt to introduce the topic and present a conclusion, but both sections are lacking in clarity. The introduction should clearly state the reasons for self-employment and the conclusion should neatly tie together the arguments made. Ensure that the conclusion doesn't introduce new ideas.
coherence cohesion
Main points need better support with clear, relevant examples. General statements are made without concrete evidence. Refer to specific studies, statistics, or provide clear, hypothetical examples to back up your points.
task achievement
While the essay attempts to address the prompt, the response is only partially complete because the second part of the task regarding the disadvantages of self-employment is not as developed as the first part. Ensure that you address all parts of the question equally.
task achievement
Ideas are presented, but they could be clearer and more comprehensive. Use simple and clear language to express your points. Avoid overly complex wording that does not add substance to the argument. Try to make your ideas easy to understand.
task achievement
The essay lacks relevant and specific examples to support the points being made. Try to include real-life examples or scenarios that can clearly demonstrate the points about self-employment and its disadvantages.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-employment
  • freelancing
  • entrepreneurship
  • autonomy
  • financial stability
  • work-life balance
  • financial insecurity
  • lack of support
  • resources
  • long working hours
  • uncertain income
  • job security
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