Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
In the modern era, individuals prefer to be self-employed rather than working under the employers in different organisations. Well, there are various extrapolates behind
this
trend along with
various disastrous effects on society. I will explicate these in the upcoming paragraphs along with
the relevant examples and thus
will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
To commence with reasons, why do humans prefer working for themself? The prominent reason behind this
is that men and women do not have enough education as well as
experience level to meet the requirements of the company
to acquire a job position. A piece of evidence related to this
scenario is, as I saw in the newspaper last
month, Tata company
was hiring people but only those who already have 10 years of working experience from any multinational company
along with
a degree of law from the best law schools in Canada or Australia. Hence
, due to
such
cases, people are left with no options to open their own business
. Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
Besides
, some employers do not show a good demeanour towards their employees, as they treat them not like their workers but as they are slaves. As a consequence
, the bulk of individuals start their freelance work to fulfil their basic necessities. Needless to say, these pros stand in very good stead.
On the flip side, being self-employed does not provide guaranteed bi-weekly or monthly salaries because in this
case
, single
person is going to be liable for all the losses and profits. Add an article
a single
Whereas
, Correct word choice
However
this
is not the case
if you work in any company
, either the firm incur
gain or loss, Correct subject-verb agreement
incurs
workers
will get their pay on time.
Correct word choice
and workers
Furthermore
, in independent entrepreneurship, only one person is bearing the all stress regarding working hours, sales and management as well. This
case
might cause physical or psychological disorders to the owner therefore
, the business needs to be shut down in such
case
. Hence
, it is apparent to say, why many people are against this
trend.
To conclude
, according to
the reasons aforementioned above one can reach a logical result that the drawbacks of working independently are instrumental indeed. Nevertheless
, its potential benefits should not be overlooked either.Submitted by ss6802125 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay needs a clearer and more logical structure. The ideas presented are not always well-organized and can be difficult to follow. Consider planning your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs each discussing one main idea, and a conclusion that summarizes the points made.
coherence cohesion
There is an attempt to introduce the topic and present a conclusion, but both sections are lacking in clarity. The introduction should clearly state the reasons for self-employment and the conclusion should neatly tie together the arguments made. Ensure that the conclusion doesn't introduce new ideas.
coherence cohesion
Main points need better support with clear, relevant examples. General statements are made without concrete evidence. Refer to specific studies, statistics, or provide clear, hypothetical examples to back up your points.
task achievement
While the essay attempts to address the prompt, the response is only partially complete because the second part of the task regarding the disadvantages of self-employment is not as developed as the first part. Ensure that you address all parts of the question equally.
task achievement
Ideas are presented, but they could be clearer and more comprehensive. Use simple and clear language to express your points. Avoid overly complex wording that does not add substance to the argument. Try to make your ideas easy to understand.
task achievement
The essay lacks relevant and specific examples to support the points being made. Try to include real-life examples or scenarios that can clearly demonstrate the points about self-employment and its disadvantages.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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