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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show information about the annual profits, the final stock prices and the market share of five different video game companies in 2022.

The charts below show information about the annual profits, the final stock prices and the market share of five different video game companies in 2022.
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The bar chart illustrates the annual
profits
Use synonyms
 of five video game companies,
while
Linking Words
 the table compares each company's final
stock
Use synonyms
 and
market
Use synonyms
share
Use synonyms
 in 2022.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Bitmaster
Use synonyms
 was the most successful company in terms of income and
market
Use synonyms
share
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 Gamazing had the lowest
profits
Use synonyms
 and contribution to the
market
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 2022,
Bitmaster
Use synonyms
, Dataright and Dimensional all had
profits
Use synonyms
 above 75 million
dollars
Use synonyms
, with
Bitmaster
Use synonyms
 leading the way at 125 million
dollars
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 was reflected in their respective
market
Use synonyms
 shares, with
Bitmaster
Use synonyms
 having the highest at 20%, and a final
stock
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 of 115.27
dollars
Use synonyms
 per
share
Use synonyms
. Despite having a lower
market
Use synonyms
share
Use synonyms
 of 17%, Dimensional had a higher final
stock
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 than
Bitmaster
Use synonyms
 at 123.88
dollars
Use synonyms
 per
share
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Graphiz and Gamazing had
profits
Use synonyms
 below 75 million
dollars
Use synonyms
 and
consequently
Linking Words
 had the lowest
market
Use synonyms
 shares and final
stock
Use synonyms
 prices in 2022.
Graphiz
Correct your spelling
Graphic
 had a
market
Use synonyms
share
Use synonyms
 of 10% and a final
stock
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 of around 50
dollars
Use synonyms
 per
share
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 Gamazing had a
market
Use synonyms
share
Use synonyms
 of 4% and a final
stock
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 of 23
dollars
Use synonyms
 per
share
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words profits, stock, market, share, bitmaster, dollars, price with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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