IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people feel that it will be better for society and individuals if driverless cars are widely used. Others are not in favour of the same. Discuss both the point of views and give your opinion.

#people #society #individuals #driverless #cars #favour #point
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In the present age, there has been much discussion revolving around the issue of whether autonomous
cars
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 should be used widely so they
make
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have
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 more benefits for society and individuals than a car with a driver. It is understandable that autonomous
cars
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 give safety assurance, especially if you are drunk or sick.
However
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, I believe that we are not ready yet to let those kinds of
cars
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 on our messy
roads
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 and other obstacles.
To begin
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 with, currently,
roads
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 in
this
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 country are not organised well. To explain
this
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, there are many large
roads
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 that are turned into small
roads
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 that have not been captured yet in Google Maps. Driverless
cars
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 are highly dependent on the data from the internet, so we may be stuck on the trip if the map does not give directions.
Next,
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these
cars
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 are just barely new to our society. They need many improvements in order to be appropriate
cars
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. These reasons made me disagree with the usage of driverless
cars
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. Human-controlled
cars
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,
on the other hand
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, are flexible in any kind of circumstances, especially in the countryside that has many alleys.
Moreover
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, if we are in a place that does not catch signals, these
cars
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 are still able to operate, unlike autonomous
cars
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. But, safety conditions
such
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 as not driving
while
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 drunk must be obeyed. Conclusively, autonomous
cars
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 are not suitable in
this
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 country because of street conditions, and the fact that these
cars
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 are very vulnerable in less signal areas,
while
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 regular
cars
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 are easy to manage.
Submitted by erniwbs on

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introduction conclusion present
The essay's introduction should more clearly present the two views and state your own opinion to provide a roadmap for the readers. The conclusion should summarize the main points effectively and restate your stance.
logical structure
Your essay requires a more logical sequence of points with clear topic sentences and cohesive devices to enhance the readability and the flow of arguments.
supported main points
Support your main points with more detailed and specific examples to strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.
complete response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the task by discussing both views provided in the prompt and giving a clear opinion. Expand on the reasons and supporting points to address the prompt more comprehensively.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify and expand upon your ideas to ensure they are comprehensive and fully developed. This involves providing elaboration and examples where necessary to support the points made.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate more relevant and specific examples to illustrate the points being made. This can include real-world situations, statistics, or hypothetical scenarios that relate directly to the prompt.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. **Autonomous Vehicles** - A term referring to driverless or self-driving cars.
  • 2. **Human Error** - Mistakes made by people while driving, often leading to accidents.
  • 3. **Traffic Congestion** - Overcrowded roadways, often resulting in slower movement.
  • 4. **Mobility Solutions** - Transportation options for individuals who have difficulty moving around.
  • 5. **Emissions** - Pollutants released into the air by vehicles.
  • 6. **Technical Reliability** - The dependability of the technology to function as intended.
  • 7. **Job Displacement** - The loss of jobs due to new technology or automation.
  • 8. **Cyber-attacks** - Attempts by hackers to gain unauthorized access to computerized systems.
  • 9. **Liability** - Legal responsibility for something, often in the context of accidents or damages.
  • 10. **Ethical Considerations** - Moral issues that arise regarding the fairness and implications of decisions.
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