Some developed countries now have unemployment problems. Why do people still want to emigrate to these countries? Give reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

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Nowadays,

due to

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the recession period, many of the well-developed communities are facing an economic downturn causing many companies and businesses to shut down which leads to the issue of unemployment.Despite

this

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, many immigrants want to settle down there. In

this

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essay, I will explain the reasons why the population want to immigrate there. First and foremost, undeveloped and developing states don’t have effective

healthcare

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infrastructure

as well

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Correct word choice

and

show examples

Many poor

countries

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' governments do not provide free

healthcare

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or insurance systems to

individuals

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people

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have to spend a lot of money for their treatment and the

population

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populations

show examples

these

countries

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are moving well-developed nations in search of better

healthcare

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For instance

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in India there is an undeveloped and costly

healthcare

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system and

people

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from India are moving to Canada as they have much better

healthcare

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infrastructure

as well as

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the government of Canada is covering their costs of

healthcare

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In addition

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this

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, most of the younger generation are interested in exploring different origins

as well as

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they are influenced by Western cultures and they moved to these

countries

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to explore and learn more about

countries

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However

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, some of the

individuals

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move to developed

countries

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due to

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their rules and regulations .

For example

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people

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are moving to the United States as they have strict rules and

people

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are following them if any of the

individuals

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are following the rules they are getting punished for that.

Instead

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this

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, well-developed nations have less pollution than other nations and

individuals

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are emitting them because of good and hygienic lifestyles. In conclusion,

Instead

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of having unemployment issues in some states,

community

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communities

show examples

are in favour of moving in search of a good lifestyle because of

healthcare

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facilities, regulations and many more

sirat Thu Dec 21 2023

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task achievement

Your essay provides an answer to the question and includes relevant examples, such as the healthcare system in India and Canada and pollution issues in developed countries. However, the clarity and expansion of these ideas could be improved to enhance the comprehensive understanding of the reader. Also, your essay would score higher if you had developed the main points with stronger supporting arguments and clearer explanations to provide insight into why these reasons are compelling people to emigrate, which is crucial for task response.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks clear logical transitions and cohesive devices to link ideas effectively. Using a variety of linking words and phrases can improve the flow of the essay. Moreover, each paragraph should have a clear central idea, and subsequent sentences should elaborate on that idea in a logical manner. To refine your coherence and cohesion score, focus on structuring your paragraphs around central themes and ensure each sentence contributes to the development of those themes. A conclusive statement that ties the main points together and reaffirms the thesis would strengthen your essay's overall cohesion.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Some developed countries now have unemployment problems. Why do people still want to emigrate to these countries? Give reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is a better than watching TV or playing computers game for children to what extend do you agree

Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in seprate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this ia unnecessary or even negative. Discuss the possible arguments on both sides, and say which side you personally support.

Do you think consumers should avoid over packed products or is it the responsibility of the producers to avoid extra packaging of goods?