Nowadays, most people try to balance work and other part of lives. Unfortunately, not many achieve this balance. What are the problems of this? Suggest some solutions to slove the problem?

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In
this
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present world, many
people
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aiming
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aim
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to achieve
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work life
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work-life
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balance
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in their lives.
However
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, only certain
people
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could attain
this
Linking Words
type of
life-style
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lifestyle
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. In my opinion, the reasons why
people
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failed
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fail
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to
balance
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their
work
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because
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is because
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they are expected to get
higher
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a higher
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salary and achieve certain
position
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positions
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in their jobs.
By planning
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Planning
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and
set
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setting
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priority
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priorities
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to
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for
show examples
their daily activities,
it
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apply
show examples
could ease their problems and achieve their goals. The primary reason why many
people
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could not
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cannot
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balance
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their
work
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because
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is because
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they try to perform well in their
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job
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jobs
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and get an increment in their salary.
For example
Linking Words
, an employee who
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work
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works
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as
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in
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a
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apply
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sales
try
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tries
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to achieve and surpass their yearly sales achievement as their Key Performance Indicator (KPI) to get
higher
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a higher
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commission.
This
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ambition could make them
work
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harder or even
work
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over time
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overtime
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to achieve the target.
As a consequence
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, they
forgot
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forget
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to manage their time between their social life and hobbies because their drowning in
work
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. Aiming
about
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for
show examples
certain
job
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position
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positions
show examples
is another reason why they
failed
Wrong verb form
fail
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to
balance
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their
work
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, fresh graduates are likely to get their
early-
Correct your spelling
early job
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job
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as
a
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apply
show examples
management
trainee
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trainees
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because they could have
broaden
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broadened
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their
job
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opportunity
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opportunities
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as
a
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apply
show examples
manager
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managers
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in
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at
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an early age.
This
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occasion could make fresh
gradutes
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graduates
focused on their
job
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thoroughly, higher responsibility and could be promoted
as
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to
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management level. Because of
this
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, they have to be loyal to their company and spend their time to
finished
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finish
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their tasks quickly.
By writing
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Writing
show examples
all
activites
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activities
,
manage
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managing
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priorities, and planning the schedule could help to distinguish between
job
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and hobby. To
illustrates
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illustrate
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,
people
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who
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are acquantied
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acquantied
Correct your spelling
acquainted
to digital calendar could manage their
task
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tasks
show examples
effectively because they could
stright
Correct your spelling
straight
away write their
task
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tasks
show examples
in
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on
show examples
their phone and follow the schedule during the day. In conclusion,
people
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who set higher
wage
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wages
show examples
and get promoted to higher
job
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level
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levels
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could be the reasons why
people
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not
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do not
did not
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effectively manage their
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work life
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work-life
show examples
balance
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. Making
tasklist
Correct article usage
a tasklist
show examples
, planning which activity could be done
first,
Linking Words
and exporting the data to
digital
Correct article usage
a digital
show examples
calendar could be helpful to succeed
Linking Words
this
Change preposition
in this
show examples
balance
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by dewifarraprasasya on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear structure, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and be well-developed with specific examples or explanations.
task achievement
Task response can be improved by thoroughly addressing all parts of the prompt. Make sure to provide a balanced discussion of problems and solutions. Examples should be directly related to the points made and contribute to a full answer to the question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • burnout
  • flexible work arrangements
  • remote working
  • compressed workweeks
  • boundaries
  • disconnect
  • mental health
  • productivity
  • societal norms
  • career success
  • recharge
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