In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

Nowadays,
people
contemplate more
whether
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
they should buy or
rent
a
house
. In numerous countries, it is vital for
people
to own one rather than
renting
Wrong verb form
rent
show examples
it. Both ways have their advantages and disadvantages. In my
perspectives
Fix the agreement mistake
perspective
show examples
, owning
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one is more beneficial in many ways
such
as financial and social status. There are reasons to support the claim.
To begin
with, purchasing a
house
is a huge payment. It usually takes a legion of years to complete the
installment
Change the spelling
instalment
show examples
.
Thus
,
people
who can afford a
house
would be the
people
who have no monetary issues.
This
will make the owner of the
house
have a better place in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society as they are financially successful.
Moreover
,
this
might
also
have a good impact on some
people
’s
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
who need to gain
trust
Correct article usage
the trust
show examples
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
people
,
for example
, investors. By owning a
house
, they would look more trustworthy;
hence
,
people
will believe what they say or suggest, meaning more
people
will be confident enough to invest with them.
In addition
, buying a
house
is considered a positive — it is a kind of investment. Even though you are no longer living there, you can still let someone
rent
it. If someone is renting your
house
, they will have to pay the
rent
to you every month.
This
means that you will constantly gain some money from letting
people
rent
your
house
.
This
will be the other way of gaining money apart from your main job. In conclusion, owning a
house
has a variety of advantages. The owner will have a better place in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society,
look
Correct word choice
and look
show examples
more trustworthy.
Furthermore
, it is
also
an investment.
Therefore
, it is not surprising that, in some countries, it is essential for
people
to have their own
house
.
Submitted by dondollaraus on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
You need to ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Some paragraphs lack a strong linking sentence to weave the points together seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to include an introduction and conclusion that clearly define the scope of the essay and summarize the main points without introducing new arguments.
coherence cohesion
Support each of your main points with specific, detailed examples. If necessary, do so by extending or developing your ideas further to add depth to your arguments.
task achievement
While you have responded to the task, it's important to cover all parts of the prompt completely. Ensure your response fully answers the question and remains on topic.
task achievement
Your ideas should be clear, well-thought-out, and comprehensive. Ensure each paragraph explores its main idea thoroughly, and contributes to the overall position of the essay.
task achievement
Use relevant, specific examples to substantiate your points. Examples should be pertinent and enrich the arguments you are presenting in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: