Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opmion
Advertisement
play a crucial role in Fix the agreement mistake
Advertisements
business
sector Add an article
the business
as well as
Change preposition
in people
people
lives. Some claim that adverts can foster Change noun form
people's
to buy
products by Change the verb form
buying
detail
Replace the word
detailed
description
of the Fix the agreement mistake
descriptions
things
while
others say that it just
a normal thing the population do not Add a missing verb
is just
pay
focus on. I strongly agree with the latter opinion for the following reasons.
On the one hand, advertisements give the product's details which how to use, what are the ingredients are included in briefly in order to Verb problem
apply
people
have to understand about the produts
. To clarify, it can stimulate to buy Correct your spelling
products
things
frequently by
Change preposition
through
their
varieties of Correct pronoun usage
its
ad
. Fix the agreement mistake
ads
For example
, actors and actress
act the Fix the agreement mistake
actresses
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
while
people
can blindly believe their favourite persons who acted then
they will buy constantly. In other words
, it influences the population to purchase unwanted stuff too. Then
, advertisements manipulating
Wrong verb form
manipulate
public
to purchase many Add an article
the public
things
.
On the other hand
, ad
is just a normal thing Add an article
the ad
an ad
people
should not give focus to it. This
is because,
it brings Remove the comma
apply
determental
effects Correct your spelling
detrimental
among
the population Change preposition
to
such
as it manupulates
to buy unwanted Correct your spelling
manipulates
manipulated
stuffs
constantly. Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
For instance
, a recent report done by the Times of India said that more than 70% of the
individuals purchase products by influencing the ad that really not required. Correct article usage
apply
This
foster
Wrong verb form
fosters
people
's consumerism and product choices, thus
, frequently buying many things
can affect the economic situation to
Change preposition
of
people
. Hence
, folks should not give
attention to Verb problem
pay
advertisement
because it is Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
a
normal.
Change the article
apply
To conclude
, although
advertisement
gives full information about a particular product like ingredients and how to use it, it
Correct pronoun usage
they
brings
more detrimental effects Correct subject-verb agreement
bring
due to
buy
constantly unwanted Change the verb form
buying
stuffs
. Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
Therefore
, in my opinion about
Change preposition
apply
Correct pronoun usage
apply
this
, advertisement
is just a normal thing we should not give more attention to it
.Correct pronoun usage
apply
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coherence cohesion
Throughout your essay, it is important to maintain a clear and logical progression of ideas. Aim to organize your paragraphs with clear topic sentences and supporting sentences that expand on the main idea coherently. Transition words should be used effectively to link ideas within and across paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion are concise and effectively summarize your main points. While present, both lacked a sophisticated construction that communicates your stance and sums up the essay. The introduction should clearly state the topic and your thesis, whereas the conclusion should reiterate your viewpoint without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
To strengthen your main points, develop your ideas with clear explanations, and include more specific and detailed examples to support your arguments. Your essay presented a general overview, but richer detail would enhance the impact of your writing.
task achievement
Make sure that you address all parts of the task. While you discussed both views, the argument could have been more balanced, with equal attention to each side before introducing your opinion. The essay should reflect a complete response to every aspect of the task prompt.
task achievement
The ideas you presented were related to the task, but they need to be expressed more comprehensively. Work on developing clearer and more systematic arguments. This can be achieved by spending more time analyzing each point of view and your own stance, ensuring you explain the reasoning behind your opinion.
task achievement
Try to incorporate relevant and specific examples to substantiate your claims. You included an example, but it was somewhat generic. More precise and varied examples would enhance the effectiveness of your arguments and demonstrate an understanding of the topic at hand.