Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opmion

#people #attention #opmion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Use synonyms

Fix the agreement mistake

advertisements

show examples

because it is

Change the article

apply

show examples

normal.

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

Use synonyms

gives full information about a particular product like ingredients and how to use it,

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

brings

Correct subject-verb agreement

bring

show examples

more detrimental effects

due to

Linking Words

buy

Change the verb form

buying

show examples

constantly unwanted

stuffs

Change the wording

stuff

kinds of stuff

pieces of stuff

show examples

Therefore

Linking Words

, in my opinion

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

Use synonyms

is just a normal thing we should not give more attention to

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Submitted by reanudeepan on Fri Dec 22 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Throughout your essay, it is important to maintain a clear and logical progression of ideas. Aim to organize your paragraphs with clear topic sentences and supporting sentences that expand on the main idea coherently. Transition words should be used effectively to link ideas within and across paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your introduction and conclusion are concise and effectively summarize your main points. While present, both lacked a sophisticated construction that communicates your stance and sums up the essay. The introduction should clearly state the topic and your thesis, whereas the conclusion should reiterate your viewpoint without introducing new information.

coherence cohesion

To strengthen your main points, develop your ideas with clear explanations, and include more specific and detailed examples to support your arguments. Your essay presented a general overview, but richer detail would enhance the impact of your writing.

task achievement

Make sure that you address all parts of the task. While you discussed both views, the argument could have been more balanced, with equal attention to each side before introducing your opinion. The essay should reflect a complete response to every aspect of the task prompt.

task achievement

The ideas you presented were related to the task, but they need to be expressed more comprehensively. Work on developing clearer and more systematic arguments. This can be achieved by spending more time analyzing each point of view and your own stance, ensuring you explain the reasoning behind your opinion.

task achievement

Try to incorporate relevant and specific examples to substantiate your claims. You included an example, but it was somewhat generic. More precise and varied examples would enhance the effectiveness of your arguments and demonstrate an understanding of the topic at hand.

15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Recent research has shown that business meetings and training are increasingly taking place online. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
Many businesses today choose to hold meetings and do training online, rather than in person. While this has certain drawbacks related to interpersonal relationships, I still feel this is a positive trend because of its positive impact on employees with families. In this essay, I will discuss both sides in detail.
7.5
band
Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Many people believe that reading books is more beneficial for children compared to watching TV or playing computer games. I strongly agree with this opinion and this essay will give further explanations.
6
band
Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and uses up the world’s fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Air travel has been a controversial way of transport because many people think it causes major pollution issues and consumes a hideous amount of the world's fuel resources. People have been arguing if air travel must be restricted or not. This essay will examine my personal opinion on this issue.
6
band
n the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. What extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
There is no denying the fact that the newest online method to read news of books replaced people's behaviour rather than the traditional ones. While it is a commonly held belief that the cheapest way to read and the availability of online sources will make nobody want to buy printed journals or books. There is also an argument that opposite it. I believe that online websites are more practical and better.
6.5
band
The population of many cities is growing rapidly. What are the effects on people living in these cities? What can be done to maintain the quality of life of people?
Along with the rapid development of the global economy, the attraction of cities is more and more visible to the community in every part of the world. As a result, people have the tendency to move to large metropolises to pursue their careers and settle down. That movement causes some problems, including pollution and deterioration of living standards. This essay will point out some issues and propose some feasible solutions for the above topic.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opmion

Recent research has shown that business meetings and training are increasingly taking place online. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and uses up the world’s fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

n the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. What extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The population of many cities is growing rapidly. What are the effects on people living in these cities? What can be done to maintain the quality of life of people?