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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some believe that the best way to stay fit is to join a gym or health club while others think doing everyday activities such as walking and climbing stairs is enough. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

While
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 some argue that joining a
gym
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 is the best
way
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 to stay fit, others believe that regular exercise
such
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 as walking is enough for staying fit . Personally, I strongly believe that everyday
activities
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 are not only a more effective
way
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 but
also
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 a sustainable and accessible method for staying fit in the long term. On the one hand, many think that joining a
gym
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 is the best
way
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 to get fit, where
gyms
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 provide professional types of equipment and a structured workout environment.
This
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 method makes them stay committed to their fitness goals.
Moreover
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, sports centres provide guidance from personal trainers, which helps
individuals
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 perform exercise correctly and avoid injuries. Not only are
gyms
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 costly for low-income
individuals
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, but they
also
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 require a strong long-term commitment that many struggle to maintain.
For instance
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, a 2024 study conducted by the UK Health Institute revealed that only 30% of
gym
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 members continue to attend regularly after six months.
This
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 suggests that
while
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gyms
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 offer valuable resources, most people struggle with long-term commitment.
Consequently
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, simple daily
activities
Use synonyms
 like walking are more sustainable and realistic options for staying fit.
However
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, I believe that relying solely on
gyms
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 may not be an effective long-term strategy to stay fit.
On the other hand
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, others believe that doing daily exercise
such
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 as walking and climbing stairs is more convenient and affordable.
In other words
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, all
individuals
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 can do it anywhere and anytime even if they are at their work. Walking does not require a specific place.
Furthermore
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, these
activities
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 do not take much effort, making them more encouraging than
gym
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 exercises.
For example
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, a recent BBC survey revealed that over 80% of
individuals
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 who incorporated walking and stair climbing into their daily routines reported better physical and mental health, highlighting how small, consistent
activities
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 can lead to sustainable fitness outcomes without the need for structured
gym
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 sessions.
Therefore
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, I believe that
this
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way
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 is a more practical and sustainable
way
Use synonyms
 to stay fit for most people. In conclusion,
although
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 attending
gyms
Use synonyms
 is beneficial in staying fit for some, I think that doing everyday
activities
Use synonyms
 is Sufficient for getting fit because it is more convenient and affordable for all levels of society.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction is clear, but it could be more engaging. Try to make it more interesting.
Task Achievement
In the conclusion, repeat your main points more clearly to reinforce your stance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Avoid some complex sentences; simpler is often better for clear communication.
Task Achievement
You provide relevant examples to support your points, showing good understanding.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your paragraphs are organized well, making it easy to follow your argument.
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