IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Everyone should become vegetarian because they do not need to eat meat to have healthy diet. Do you agree or disagree?

#meat #diet
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Many people believe that becoming a vegetarian is considered
as
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apply
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an efficient way for better health.
Although
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 I agree that vegetarian diets could provide us with a healthier body, I am not in
favor
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favour
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 of stopping eating meat for everyone to enjoy good health. There are some reasons why becoming a vegetarian is beneficial.
Firstly
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, it is true that a plant-based diet is naturally high in
fiber
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fibre
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 and low in saturated fats, which helps alleviate the risks of
the
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chronic illnesses
such
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 as obesity, heart
diseases
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disease
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, and
cancers
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cancer
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.
Secondly
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, eating some types of vegetables probably gives us critical nutrients.
For example
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, one of the benefits of broccoli is its nutrient content, it is loaded with a wide range of vitamins, minerals, and
fiber
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fibre
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 in order to strengthen the immune system
in
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of
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 human life.
As a result
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,
instead
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 of consuming a lot of vegetables, just need a dish of steamed broccoli
However
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, a vegetarian diet still has some drawbacks that we need to take into consideration. On the one hand, without meat, we cannot get the adequate amount of protein we need to grow strong and healthy.
Consequently
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, with the intensive use of plant-based foods, he or she might feel tired, lethargic, and unable to do anything.
In addition
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,
while
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 a meatless diet is often bland, meat products taste more delicious.
Thus
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, vegetarians could supplement seitan
such
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 as chicken breast and various kinds of fish
that
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 deep-fried or steamed to increase flavour for daily meals. In conclusion,
although
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 vegetarian diets could give better health, not everyone is suitable for
this
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 method because it requires various and balanced diets in processing.
Submitted by vanhiep89.do on

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introduction conclusion present
Ensure your essay has a clear introductory statement and conclusion. While these elements are present, they could benefit from more clarity in terms of your position on the subject matter. A concise thesis in the introduction and a restated position in the conclusion can strengthen your essay.
logical structure
Strive to organize your ideas logically throughout the essay. Utilize clear paragraph structures and cohesive devices effectively to guide the reader through your argument. This creates a logical flow that increases the readability and comprehension of your essay.
supported main points
Support each of your main points with specific examples or evidence. This not only strengthens your argument but also demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the topic. Specific examples add credibility and depth to your discussion.
complete response
Ensure that your essay completely responds to the task by directly addressing the prompt given. This includes clearly expressing whether you agree or disagree with the statement. While you have provided an opinion, make sure that it aligns consistently throughout your essay without ambiguity.
clear comprehensive ideas
Develop clear and comprehensive ideas that directly respond to the essay prompt. Your ideas should clearly support your position on the subject and should be explicitly connected to the thesis statement to maintain a focused argument.
relevant specific examples
Use relevant, specific examples to support your ideas. This deepens your analysis and demonstrates a better command of the topic. Try to include well-developed examples that are directly connected to the main points you are arguing.
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