Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Recently, many countries have assisted worldwide

sports

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by constructing unique

facilities

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for high

athletes

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to enhance their performance. alternatively of giving

sports

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space for non-

athletes

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That is

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a negative development, humans should practice

sports

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even if they're not professional

athletes

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. I feel that for two reasons which I will explore in the following essay.

Initially

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, the nation has the right to train in

sports

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facilities

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without any fiddly. Because people if they train well they'll become high

athletes

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in the future but if don'

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find any

sports

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places where they should train. their ability to participate in national competitions will decrease and they won'

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be qualified to participate in international competitions.

For example

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, the United States provides many

facilities

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to non-

athletes

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, but because it doesn'

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the number of Olympic medaille would be reduced and the figure of high

athletes

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would go down. Despite

this

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, there are several positive achievements for top

athletes

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, who will benefit from

this

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specialized building as much as they can, they will focus more on their training records,

also

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the number of achievements will increase.

Therefore

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, the positive effect of well-designed

sports

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places is applied to the

athletes

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and the staff behind

this

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achievement.

For instance

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, the UK government built specialized

facilities

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for high

athletes

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, which led them to win numerous Medaille at every international Olympics. In conclusion, it is frequently said that building an upscale place is worthwhile for high-performance

athletes

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In contrast

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, if these kinds of

facilities

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aren'

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accessible for beginner

athletes

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the number of sportive people will be reduced. In my opinion, highly designed

sports

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places should be shared with the whole

sports

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generation.

alihafiidFri Dec 22 2023

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coherence cohesion

Your essay lacks a clear structure. It is important to have a distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion to guide the reader smoothly through your arguments. Use paragraphing to separate ideas and maintain a logical flow.

coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are present but they are not effectively built. Introduction should clearly state the topic and your stance, while the conclusion should summarize the main points and reiterate your opinion.

coherence cohesion

While you made an attempt to support your main points, the development of these points is limited. You should aim to provide more detailed explanations and examples to make your argument stronger and more persuasive.

task achievement

Your response only partially addresses the task. You should ensure that you discuss both views of the statement and provide a clear opinion as the task asks for a discussion and not only your viewpoint.

task achievement

Your ideas are relevant but not developed thoroughly. Work on expanding your supporting details to fully address the question prompt. This involves elaborating on points with more comprehensive explanations and examples that are directly linked to the topic.

task achievement

You included examples, but they were not entirely specific or relevant. Strive for clarity in your illustrations and make sure they align with the point you are trying to make. Specificity in examples can significantly enhance the strength of your argument.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

specialised facilities
train top athletes
international sports
boost
reputation
attract
sporting events
access
general public
inequality
opportunities
overemphasis
elite sports
neglect
grassroots development

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