Nowadays, most countries can improve the standard of living through economic development, but some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of this phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #development #values #phenomenon

this

modern era, the standard of living for the majority of countries has increased through economic avenues,

however

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however,

show examples

this

has compromised our social values. In

this

essay, I will discuss why there are more pros to

this

notion rather than cons and form a conclusion.

Firstly

, the industrialisation of a nation provides many benefits for the population as a whole.

For instance

, investment

into

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healthcare or educational facilities generates a prosperous society. People will gradually become more educated, obtain

first class

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first-class

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degrees and secure

top class

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top-class

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occupations.

Furthermore

, there will be an influx of medical professionals

as well as

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overall

healthier population.

This

will not

ony

Correct your spelling

only

cause

above average

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above-average

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satisfaction levels for the residents, but

also

a thriving economy for the country.

Secondly

, financial funds harvested into the tourism sector of a nation

results

Correct subject-verb agreement

result

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in another great economic benefit. Monetary sanctions geared towards attractions, like Disneyland promote people from all across the globe

as well as

those who already reside in the country.

This

means that

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apply

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there is more funding for investment within one’s own nation

as a result

of significant tourism.

Overall

this

will increase the levels of happiness within the land.

On the other hand

, the construction of various different types of infrastructure can have a negative effect on our social circles.

For example

, the demolition of parks in favour

for

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housing reduces our social networking. People rely on scenic getaways as a method of interaction with the local neighbourhood and a chance to establish new connections. If

this

is all taken away

then

, many will not have the chance to interact with others anymore.

Additionally

, the older generation

depend

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depends

show examples

such

locations as another avenue for communication,as they do not usually possess modern technological devices. In conclusion, there are more advantages, including educational and health aid compared to the disadvantages of

such

a claim.

Submitted by abeera2012 on Fri Dec 22 2023

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coherence cohesion

You have presented your argument in a clear and generally logical manner. However, there is room for improvement in the overall strength and clarity of the essay structure. To enhance your score, consider creating a more solid framework for your essay where each paragraph seamlessly flows into the next, thereby ensuring a cohesive argument throughout.

task achievement

Your essay maintains relevance to the topic, but you should seek to develop your key ideas further. When writing about advantages and disadvantages, it is essential to discuss each point sufficiently and offer deeper insights or more comprehensive arguments. Additionally, specific and tangible examples could significantly strengthen the point you are making, and ensure they are directly related to the question prompt for a more compelling response.

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

309 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

standard of living
economic development
social values
materialism
community welfare
sustainable technologies
environmental degradation
social stratification
social cohesion
economic status

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Nowadays, most countries can improve the standard of living through economic development, but some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of this phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages?

The best way that a government can reduce the traffic congestion in cities is to provide public transport free of cost to people 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Some employers offer their employees subsidised membership of gyms and sport clubs, believing that this will make their staff healthier and thus more effective at work. Other employers see no benefit in doing so. Consider the argument from both aspect of this possible debate, and reach conclusion.

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?