The table shows information and prediction regarding the change in the percentage of population aged 65 years and above in three countries.

The table shows information and prediction regarding the change in the percentage of population aged 65 years and above in three countries.
The grid depicts statistics and forecasts concerning the transfigure of the elderly in certain countries namely Canadian, German, and British communities in 1988,
2000
Correct word choice
and 2000
show examples
, and predicted figures for 2030.
While
the data is measured in percentages. As a general trend, the existence of citizens aged 65 years and above experienced an increase
as well as
the prediction year. It could be plainly viewed that in 1988, Germany had the largest population of golden-agers which stood at 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
whereas
Canada and the UK had lesser proportions,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
for 16% and 14%, respectively. Moving twelve years ahead, there is a significant growth of 5% indicating that senior residents in Germany and Canada have increased. Meanwhile, Great Britain
also
has tediously improved to 15%.
On the other hand
, the projection for the year 2030 presents a considerable rise at about 5% in entire triad nations. Later than that, the figures for Germany are predicted to be 30%, Canada is predicted to be 26%, 
while
the UK will be at 20%.
Submitted by pnasywasina on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: