In many countries, the quality of life in the large cities is becoming worse. What causes this problem? What measure can be taken to solve it?

In some countries, it
becomes
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
a fact that
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
of life is decreasing significantly, especially in the big cities. The true root cause of
this
problem
is nowadays, it is even difficult for citizens to get some fresh air, and to overcome
this
problem
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should
estabilish
Correct your spelling
establish
a strict policy in terms of gas emissions. Nowadays, the
pollution
rate
in the central cities is worsening.
This
phenomenon happens
due to
increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
show examples
rate
of private vehicle usage, which omitted a huge quantity of carbon dioxide emission. Take Jakarta as an example. In 2023, it is recorded that the
pollution
level
reach
Change the verb form
reaches
show examples
up to 80%, especially in the peak hours
while
people
use their cars to travel to their office.
As a result
, recent data from Indonesia's Ministry of Health states that the pneumonia disease in Jakarta
jump
Wrong verb form
jumped
show examples
significantly to 3200 cases, and
this
problem
has a direct link to
pollution
which
produced
Add a missing verb
is produced
show examples
from dozens of private
vehichles
Correct your spelling
vehicles
. There are some ways to
answer
Verb problem
solve
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the
pollution
problem
, and one of them is by increasing
annual
Correct article usage
the annual
show examples
car's
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car
show examples
tax to prevent
people
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
buying
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
, consumptively.
This
solution is the most strategic way to push down the
pollution
generation since
number
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the number
show examples
of
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
road
Add an article
the road
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will reduce,
as a result
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
will think twice or more before
buy
Wrong verb form
buying
show examples
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
for themselves.
For instance
, Singapore's government
establishes
Wrong verb form
established
show examples
rule
Add an article
the rule
a rule
show examples
that
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all citizens who have a private
car
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
should spend around $7900 each year.
Thus
, since the policy becomes official, the numbers of
car
ownership
Replace the word
owners
show examples
dive
Wrong verb form
dived
show examples
dramatically since
Singaporean
Fix the agreement mistake
Singaporeans
show examples
do not want to spend huge
ammount
Correct your spelling
amount
amounts
of their
mony
Correct your spelling
money
just to pay
annual
Add an article
an annual
show examples
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
. As a concrete result, the
pollution
rate
in Singapore is only about 15%, and the quality of life of Singapore citizens become the highest among countries in South East
Asian
Correct your spelling
Asia
show examples
.
To sum up
, many
people
feel that their quality of life is decreasing, especially in the central cities.
This
problem
can caused by
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
struggle to get fresh air
due to
pollution
Correct article usage
a pollution
show examples
rate
that is
uncontrollable. To solve
this
problem
, I think
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should make a solid policy about annual
car's
Change noun form
car
show examples
tax as a strategic movement.
Submitted by aidafathiaa on

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task achievement
The essay presents an issue that is generally relevant to the task. However, it lacks a full exploration of the causes and solutions to the problem. It would benefit from a broader range of ideas and a more detailed explanation of the specific causes and their corresponding measures.
coherence cohesion
The essay displays some level of organisation and attempts to link ideas and concepts, but it needs to be more logically structured. The progression of ideas from cause to solution could be clearer, and paragraphing could be utilized more effectively to enhance readability.

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