In many countries, the quality of life in the large cities is becoming worse. What causes this problem? What measure can be taken to solve it?
In some countries, it
becomes
a fact that Wrong verb form
has become
quality
of life is decreasing significantly, especially in the big cities. The true root cause of Correct article usage
the quality
this
problem
is nowadays, it is even difficult for citizens to get some fresh air, and to overcome this
problem
, government
should Add an article
the government
estabilish
a strict policy in terms of gas emissions.
Nowadays, the Correct your spelling
establish
pollution
rate
in the central cities is worsening. This
phenomenon happens due to
increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
rate
of private vehicle usage, which omitted a huge quantity of carbon dioxide emission. Take Jakarta as an example. In 2023, it is recorded that the pollution
level reach
up to 80%, especially in the peak hours Change the verb form
reaches
while
people
use their cars to travel to their office. As a result
, recent data from Indonesia's Ministry of Health states that the pneumonia disease in Jakarta jump
significantly to 3200 cases, and Wrong verb form
jumped
this
problem
has a direct link to pollution
which produced
from dozens of private Add a missing verb
is produced
vehichles
.
There are some ways to Correct your spelling
vehicles
answer
the Verb problem
solve
pollution
problem
, and one of them is by increasing annual
Correct article usage
the annual
car's
tax to prevent Change noun form
car
people
for
buying Change preposition
from
car
, consumptively. Fix the agreement mistake
cars
This
solution is the most strategic way to push down the pollution
generation since number
of Change the article
the number
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
in
Change preposition
on
road
will reduce, Add an article
the road
as a result
of
Change preposition
apply
people
will think twice or more before buy
Wrong verb form
buying
car
for themselves. Correct article usage
a car
For instance
, Singapore's government establishes
Wrong verb form
established
rule
that Add an article
the rule
a rule
for
all citizens who have a private Change preposition
apply
car
, they
should spend around $7900 each year. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Thus
, since the policy becomes official, the numbers of car
ownership
Replace the word
owners
dive
dramatically since Wrong verb form
dived
Singaporean
do not want to spend huge Fix the agreement mistake
Singaporeans
ammount
of their Correct your spelling
amount
amounts
mony
just to pay Correct your spelling
money
annual
Add an article
an annual
tax
. As a concrete result, the Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
pollution
rate
in Singapore is only about 15%, and the quality of life of Singapore citizens become the highest among countries in South East Asian
.
Correct your spelling
Asia
To sum up
, many people
feel that their quality of life is decreasing, especially in the central cities. This
problem
can caused by they
struggle to get fresh air Correct pronoun usage
their
due to
pollution
Correct article usage
a pollution
rate
that is
uncontrollable. To solve this
problem
, I think government
should make a solid policy about annual Add an article
the government
car's
tax as a strategic movement.Change noun form
car
Submitted by aidafathiaa on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay presents an issue that is generally relevant to the task. However, it lacks a full exploration of the causes and solutions to the problem. It would benefit from a broader range of ideas and a more detailed explanation of the specific causes and their corresponding measures.
coherence cohesion
The essay displays some level of organisation and attempts to link ideas and concepts, but it needs to be more logically structured. The progression of ideas from cause to solution could be clearer, and paragraphing could be utilized more effectively to enhance readability.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!